Then she became an addict. Then she lost her mind.
Another example of these short, measured sentences that deliver the most emotionally heightened moments.
Then she became an addict. Then she lost her mind.
Another example of these short, measured sentences that deliver the most emotionally heightened moments.
Just slow and measured.
The narration feels this way too.
He dragged him across the gravel lot, back to his Nova, then to the front tire, which was pushed up against a rectangular length of [End Page 116] concrete. Connolly wedged the cowboy’s head between the concrete and the tire so he couldn’t get away. I didn’t even know you could do this, and the cowboy, he didn’t seem to know it either. He’d come to by now. He’d started screaming.
Love the way the narration is meted out here... the description of the violence. The "I didn't even know you could do this, and the cowboy, he didn't seem to know either." Then the final two short sentences.
Nothing about China Lake, where my father spent most of his time, nothing about my mother, who had gone to live among the Rarámuri of Copper Canyon.
The mention of the parents here, in the list of what not to mention--love the subtleness of this move, and the way it reflects an emotion that the narration doesn't give us, otherwise.
In his balled fist, he raised a crumpled letter the same color as the envelope that had come for him and threw it toward the mouth of the bay. The August winds on our part of the coast followed predictable patterns.
There's a matter-of-factness to this narration that is reflected well in this transition I think.
Mimi had actually flirted with him.
Another significant brief moment of characterization.
Love, Mimi tried to tell herself, was a good thing.
Brief, effective characterization.
So Jiang is no longer insane, or at [End Page 24] least not like she once was.
I love the the way the story waits until after a scene the next morning for Zhao to consider what Jiang has told him the night before--it gives us a sense that the story is being propelled forward, but also a pause before we get to see inside Zhao's thoughts that seems to reflect his uncertainty/unease.
it always falls
Stokes feeling of inevitability of whatever is about to happen.
the way he was once taught to watch. None of them act any differently than usual.
This story does a really great job of throwing in these subtle moments of unease.
the number of locks he has installed
Another great detail that does a lot of work for adding to the strange feel of the story.
It took me years to catch up with you.
Feels very on par with and continues the unsettling atmosphere.
As the grandmother-to-be sits down on a chair in the hallway, Zhao An pauses the film.
Then another unsettling twist -- giving the feeling of uncertainty and unease to the story's atmosphere.
but at the hospital there are no doctors, just nurses, the doctors all long since executed or imprisoned or sent off for reeducation,
Love the way the transition from the first two lines and the subtle strangeness of the opening-- the woman moaning and the lack of names--builds into the reveal of the setting we are in.
The downstairs was no longer the same, quietly sulking space Shinji had found earlier in the morning. The life of this family took over, and the space that contained it receded into the background to play the supporting role.
And in turn Shinji fades to the background--ironically finding he is the supporting character in what was his story. He is paradoxically both supporting and main character in this final moment.
Shinji felt he belonged to a generation that had been accidentally skipped over
The unintended, left behind places.
answered
All the lovely imagery in these two paragraphs sets a meditative tone that seems to build up to the next one--sort of like a pause for Shinji to consider what's happened.
"Okay," Kazuo said. "But when a city or town develops over a long period of time, it doesn't only expand outward, but things get changed, right? Like new layers rewriting parts of the old layers, but not completely? So maybe sometimes things get left out. Like underneath where highways and train tracks intersect or where a street gets cut off on both ends. Places no one ever visits or thinks about anymore. I think about these spaces that weren't in anyone's plan."
Love this look into the character's mind though this physical description--Kazuo is interested in things that are hidden, left behind, unexpected.
"Man, you must be busy," Shinji said. "I never even hear you come home at night." "Well, can't complain in this economy. It's a blessing to be busy." Akio smiled, and wrinkles softly gathered at the outside corners of his friendly eyes. "Stay as long as you like.We have plenty of space."
Foreshadowing and/or parallel after what came in the scenes before.
It surprised her that she could think like this.
An important moment for her character I think.
one was English, and that was that.
A key indication of Shirley's beliefs about identity and nationalism.
From birth is best, of course; before Shirley there had been a Swiss nurse, and Shirley sometimes felt that she'd left some faint, unwelcome imprint.
A hint of the discomfort of Shirley's perspective comes through here.
good as gold
I like this concise descriptor, in its pithiness it also gives us an idea of Shirley's sensibilities.
I accepted this distant unrest as a normal procedure, and in any case it was nothing to do with me, busy with my fantasy life [End Page 13] beneath the eucalyptus trees. Except that it was, of course.
The transfer in the next paragraph to a more distant perspective.
The benefits mature with time. I've begun to appreciate just how much work parents invest in their children, and wives in their husbands; it's only fair for the investor to become a beneficiary.
I think the matter-of-factness of the narrator and her ultimate realization that the real "business" is the maneuvering of these relationships and the investment of children is what makes this story work so well.
The dowry, like a child that would grow, was ultimately an investment.
The direct comparison of a child to a sum of money.
dark, curly hairs
The focus on his hair is a subtle but distinctive reminder of her young age.
Why, just the other day the sauce was starting to stick, and instead of letting it burn or calling me, she just turned down the burner and gave it a stir. How about that?"
There is a humor to the ridiculousness of this, that heightens the horror of the story, I think.
but my arms grew stronger
A call back to the focus on strength--men wanting strong girls, and the mom saying the narrators father only saw her strength.
"Clients are good. Got to treat them right, keep them happy,"
The vagueness of their "business" is very funny.
assortment of wildflowers that smelled rank and bitter, like weeds
The flowers and weeds, again.
when I finally did, years into my marriage, they were so small that I continued to wear the trainers for some time. My husband didn't seem to care or know the difference.
This glimpse into the future feels really significant--as I reader I feel like we were still hoping she'd get out of it, somehow, even knowing that it's unlikely.
let the flowered weeds fall—she had a theory they could again take root.
Metaphor reflecting Stacie's more hopeful perspective, almost. That the girls can have more to them than just being used as an ornament--much like she wants the narrator to still be able to be her friend after she's been taken.
, pensively.
The grown up feel of this descriptor
I wanted to play along.
Love the echo of childhood here--but doing something that is actually more of an adult thing--"playing along" or ignoring things rather than addressing them.
Sweet red berries seeped through the three slits of a knife.
There's a violence to this image, reflecting the violence in the role of being a wife.
I wanted no more of mine.
The refusal of being forced into an adult world.
They say every girl remembers that special day when everything starts to change.
This is a very ominous start.
young wife, Esmerelda, my former babysitter, led him away.
The wife being young, and being the narrator's babysitter--the story circles around it before its clear the narrator will be in this same position
well before the loss of her gifted, handsome young husband and the considerable sadness that came to define her life.
I really enjoy the meandering feel of this section, how we start with Lourdes María and then drift through several different characters before ending back on her and "the considerable sadness that came to define her life". There's a completion to it and also a sense of evasion that echoes the loss of the play (and Kaleb).
It was important for the girls to see him happy.
The emphasis throughout the story on how the girls perceive him demonstrates a lot about this character.
She wanted to believe him, and yet wanted not to be fooled. He saw this in her—the way she existed perfectly, and with some effort, in the middle: sharp-eyed, vigilant—and he felt a flicker of guilt for it. He was the one who existed at the edges and extremes, he thought, forcing others to hold on to the middle.
Love this description of both characters. The contrast works to characterize them both.
Everything got magnificent, everything was perfect.
This in contrast to now--we get the sense that it wasn't necessarily perfect, but that maybe to the narrator now it seems that it was.
back then, a six-pack might last him a couple of days
How long an amount of alcohol can last him as a measure of points in his life
living a life that had meaning
A life of joy and adrenaline = one of meaning for this character
BRB
I'm thinking about the role of initials in place of a name--also in her friend DNR and the moment her husband is represented by the bear emoji--it's an interesting element that suggests something about character in this piece, the most important characters in the story work as symbols, while the men she remembers (Justin, Joe, Uncle Jim) have names.
Even in a situation like this, she knew what a man would let her get away with.
great line that shows how knowing what men will do, being able to read them, has had to become an integral part of her personality
it was on account of her fear of being ugly that she acted sexually.
the body/sense of self connection here, also
She felt perfect that night, which meant that her breasts inside the sundress were exploding against the material and, further down, her waist was retreating against the same, pulled inward, as if by her soul.
This connection between the body and a higher sense of self--the soul, feeling "perfect" feels signficant--a contrast to the franticness in her body in the present (and the moment earlier when she realizes she is not wearing a bra)
knife that glinted like a knife
love this odd moment of awareness in the narrative
whose memory was as strong as most people's forgetting
love this line
She was living in her parents' house. She was walking across their lawn in shorts, going nowhere special—the corner store, or the mailbox, or the house of a sometimes friend—her feet bare, her hair down, her stride full, before a man had ever looked at her.
this ending is so powerful--there a build of some of what felt like the most vivid lines about the mother throughout the story, though she's physically distant from most of it--and it seems to culminate in this final moment, which also replicates that distance/closeness the narrator has w/ her mother
She had half her hair up, half down, like two different people.
I love this line, captures well the closeness and distance in relationship with mother