- Nov 2017
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loybioproject.wordpress.com loybioproject.wordpress.com
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Published in The Egoist, a literary periodical published monthly, the article was written by T.S. Eliot under a pseudonym.
You probably don't have to go this deep, especially if you're looking tocut words
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However, Eliot’s connection to Loy is important.
Not much info in this sentence
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As far as his work
Clutter, can be removed
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What is perhaps
Clutter
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Here, he focuses much more on global isolation and issues
Examples/quotes would be handy here!
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The third and final era of Eliot’s poetry, highlighted by the publication of the Four Quartets in 1942
I actually rather liked the structure you had where you started each paragraph with an era of Pound's poetry, and might recommend maintaining it. I would try to move this to the top of the paragraph; you can decide if you want to remove the information before or find a way to incorporate it into previous paragraphs
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This served as a way for Eliot to formalize his separation with his wife.
You can tie this into the previous sentence to cut words
" . . . to Harvard, which formalized his separation with his wife."
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The poem was also influenced by financial stresses, as well as Eliot’s studies in Sanskrit and Indian philosophy.
This is an interesting side path, but you don't really go into what effects these influences had on his poetry. I would go deeper with this or cut it entirely.
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Pound called The Wasteland a work of genius and had a heavy hand in the many notable revisions to this poem.
I would say the same thing: perhaps go deeper (give a quote from Pound, maybe) and explain this relationship more, or cut it to keep your length down.
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continuously attempted to reach his wife
The verb "reach" is a little vague.
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Vivien’s insanity
We don't know that she's insane at this point, so a little exposition might be helpful
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During this time, Eliot met Ezra Pound who became an advocate for Eliot’s poetry and subsequent publication.
This detail is a little tangential and not expanded upon very much. If you're going to include it, I would delve into it further and detail their interactions, but otherwise I would cut it for brevity's sake.
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The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock in 1911, The Wasteland in 1922, and Four Quartets in 1942.
Titles in quotation marks; I'd say this for the other ones too, but will only mark it here to avoid cluttering up your page
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presents the theme of isolation;
You can cut this, as the rest of the sentence restates this
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One of the most influential intellects of the 20th century
This a bold claim that you could supplement with some details/evidence in order to persuade the reader that it's actually true:
- How do we know he was influential? Perhaps a quote from a contemporary or critic would work well here
- What did he influence (which movements, groups, etc.)?
While you do establish some of these things later on in your paper, it'd be a stronger opening if you could immediately hook the reader and persuade them that Eliot matters. Admittedly, he is well-known enough that his name might speak for itself, but you don't want to rely on that; you want your writing to reflect it.
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