those little flames, dancing in thatstill, silent church, dancing like they could hear music.

.

Your hand trembled slightly, but your gaze was steady withconcentration, your tongue between your teeth.

Arul placed his candle beside the others. You watched asintently as when you made your bead necklaces.

reverent

f

We stood in a circle, linked together like an unbreakablenecklace.

“There’s a church right by here,” Arul said. “Let’s go there andbuy a candle to give thanks to God.

.

As we walked away, you and Muthu started playing a game,tossing a bit of concrete into the air like a ball and trying to catch itagain before it fell.

“We’ll be all right,” Arul said. “We can buy more beads, and youcan try to make a go of Rukku’s necklace business, like you’dwanted

.

“Yes. The graveyard is safer,” Arul said. “No one will look for usthere.”

“Here’s the money we saved,” I announced

u

You took the bead from him, and your face brightened slowly,like the sun peeking out from behind rain clouds. The two of you

“Can’t believe they ripped up everything they got their uglyhands on,” I said

“Good,” Arul said. “We should go and see what’s left—ifanything—of our stuff.”

.

The cow edged away, but you rolled up one of the empty bananaleaves and held it out to the cow.

crooned

”

“So good,” Arul mumbled with his mouth full. “Try some,Rukku.” We were all so hungry that Arul had forgotten aboutpraying.

“Ah, what a spread!” Muthu sounded entranced.I was more impressed by how much the guests didn’t eat, as theservers cleared away banana leaves still piled high with food.“Here comes our feast,” Muthu said as a man came and stuffedsome bags into the dumpster outside the back gate of the weddinghall.

.

The crowd of guests stood and showered the couple with rosepetals. “Perfect timing,” Arul said. “They’ll move to the dining roomnext. It’s around the back. Come on.”

WEDDING BREAKFAST

nadhaswaram

”

The drone of bloodthirsty mosquitoes had wokenme several times during the night, and my arms itched with bites.

.

You shivered for a long time, whether from fear or being wet bythe cool drizzle, I wasn’t sure. When you finally grew still, I thoughtyou’d fallen asleep. But then you said, “Story?”

You shivered for a long time, whether from fear or being wet bythe cool drizzle, I wasn’t sure. When you finally grew still, I thoughtyou’d fallen asleep. But then you said, “Story?”

e

“Pick out your very own grave, Muthu.” Arul spread his handsexpansively. “So many to choose from.”

You were silent for what felt like forever.

muddled

My voice came out all panicky. I had avision of a ghost swallowing you whole.

.

retorted

graveyard.

graveyard.

graveyard.

.

bony but strong

“Our money!” Muthu gasped. “I’ve got to go back for it.”

“Rrruuukkku,” I heard the waste mart man drawl as he and theother man stumbled toward us, “I’ve found you.”

.

“You two don’t think we should move?”

steal our gold?

.

“They live on the bridge,” Sridar volunteered.

pittance

”

toiled

A nauseating smell rose and smacked me in the face, but I toiledas fast as I could.

at

“Indira Gandhi was a woman,” Arul said. “She led our country,didn’t she?”

akimbo

.

“Also,” Muthu said, “most people won’t pay as much as thosecollege girls.”

”

But I cared. I cared about him as strongly as if we’d known eachother all our lives. I couldn’t imagine our future without him andMuthu in it.

And then it rose and came at us like a monstrous cobra,swallowing everything in sight, and I ran.”

But my dad was the best fisherman in our village.

Arul’s eyes shone, bright as themoonlit river.

d

I felt too excited to sleep, so I sneaked out to join him.

.

“Don’t you ever think about the future?” I challenged him.“No,” Muthu said. “There’s enough to worry about every daywithout worrying about tomorrow.”

“Don’t you ever think about the future?” I challenged him.“No,” Muthu said. “There’s enough to worry about every daywithout worrying about tomorrow.”

.

“She didn’t say that at all. Arul, don’t you think we should savesome money?”

You set it free, Rukku,” I cut him short. “Now it can goanywhere it feels like. That was really nice of you.”

.

“Fly, balloon?” You pulled it close to your ear as if you couldhear it reply, the way I’d seen you talk to your wooden doll. “Okay,”you decided, untying the balloon. “Go.”

unfurled

That was something.No.That was everything.

.

“Your necklaces are worththeir weight in gold!”

She gave me two hundred.I returned the extra fifty.“Keep it,” she said.

”

why can’t we try to sell her jewelry?”

“Would anyone buy them?” I asked.

”

“Sell necklaces.” You sounded very pleased with yourself. “Getmoney. Get balloon.”

“Don’t you want me to come and keep an eye on the scales tomake sure the waste man doesn’t cheat us?”

“Life isn’t a competition.”

.

A sense ofhopelessness spread in my heart like the stains spreading on myskirt. Stains that would never wash out.

”

Sullen faced, the boy named Sridar stepped away as Arul joinedus.“How are you, Kumar?” Arul said to the fuzzy-lipped boy.“Look, this is our place,” Kumar replied. “It’s okay for you tocome here, but you can’t bring along every new kid in the city.”“Enough here for us all to share,” Arul said.

The reflection of the oceanand the sky gave the rubbish a bluish-gray tint, and the cool seabreeze made me like it better than the Himalayas, although I wassure the trash here was just as nasty.

.

We walked beyond the wide, tree-lined avenues of the richneighborhoods near the temple and the house where the gardenerthrew the orange at us, past smaller houses and shops whereloudspeakers blared hit songs, and reached the poorest section ofthe city I’d yet seen.

You crossed your arms over your chest and stood where youwere.

.

I slowly rolled the spicy yellow mixture of rice and vegetablesand meat into little balls with my fingers and licked the sauce offmy hands.

p

As we approached a street vendor whose spicy food was makingmy mouth water,

I rubbed the notes between my fingers, asthough they were fine silk.

.

watched you stacking pieces of cardboard and humming joyfully,the realization stabbed me

“I get to slice your hands into little tiny pieces.”

”

“Viji, I’m sorry. I see you’re trying to protect your sister, but Ibet she can do more than you think.”

His words pierced me like needles.

.

,

I didn’t say, I don’t want to become an expert ragpicker. I wantto be a teacher.

prodded

u

“Sorry, Rukku,” I said. “We have to stay.”“No, Viji,” you said in a reasonable tone. “Go.”

Kutti stayed by your side.

“Think that’s a bad smell?” Muthu cackled. “Wait till you getwhere we’re going.”

.

fragrance

“Chee!”

,

teetering

The man’s eyes fell on me. They were mean, like a rogueelephant’s.

.

guffawed

“Rukku will bring beads.” You patted your bead bag.

”

Yesu fight the bad guys?” Muthu continued. “He had twelve in hisgang—”

.

“You really never pray?” Arul looked horrified. “Even the wrongGods are better than no God.”

“What’s the point of living longer?”

”

jaunty

.

“When we grow up, I want to be a teacher,”

flitted

.

Ashamed that I was too selfish and hungry to be so noble, Idowned my fair share.

It sounded like our father, O. R. T. Narayan,something something—all in English, not Tamil like Amma’sprayers.

.

bag of beads that Teashop Aunty had given us.

Still, I felt thankful. Thankful we had at least that much. Mostof all, thankful that you were following me without a fuss, withKutti at your heels.

.

When, at last, I placed a section in my mouth, I could hear itburst as my teeth met the flesh, squeezing the juice out onto mytongue, tart at first and then sweet. Everything else melted awayexcept for the taste, the smell, the feel of the fruit on my tongue.I ate the fruit slowly. The way you liked to do things.

I felt its weight, its perfect ripeness—not too soft, not too firm.

.

sequin-studded sari

”

One wall had bits of broken glass set into the concrete on thetop, so no one could climb over without shredding their palms.“Pretty,” you said, reaching for the multicolored shards, throughwhich sunlight skipped. “Pretty.”“No, Rukku! Owwa!”

jackfruit

.

We were in plain sight.But we were invisible.

We were in plain sight.But we were invisible.

No! That’s everything we have!”

“Give me something,” she whined. “I have to look after mybrother. See him?” She gestured at a small boy—stark naked—whowas sleeping behind her.

.

“Maybe someone will want a maid,” she said. “But don’t be tootrusting. The world’s not always a kind place for two poor girls likeyou.”

She sat with you, showing you ways to tie pretty knots and braidstrands together.

twine

l

I looked behind us to see whom he was shooing.“You!” he yelled. “Get that dog away from my shop!”“It’s a good dog . . .” I began, but the man shook his fist at us.Kutti growled. I picked him up and held his squirming bodytight.

kolams

.

jackals

“No banana?”“No, sorry.”“Papaya?” you suggested.“No.”“Guava?”“No. No pomegranate, no jackfruit, no oranges, no sapotes, nosweet limes. No nothing.”

e.

wading

“Want to come for a swim?” Muthu grinned at you. “The water’snice and cool.”

Up close the river was not beautiful. It looked more gray thansilver

d

riffling

.

og of worry.

The demon tried to catch us, but we ran away and found a place—this new place where he can’t find us.

r

uge posters as tall as we were,

“Ahhh,” you murmured, cradling it in your hands as if it werethe most beautiful thing ever.

as

as

as

as

Hugging him close, like you used to hug your doll, you finallylay down on our sheet. “Story?”

“I’m Arul.” He flashed you a smile and then tried to look allstern.

”

stern

Tishoom.

”

He reminded me of a sunflower

.

tarpaulin

but

Kutti pricked up his ears and stood attentively at your side, likehe understood you perfectly.

I couldn’t help petting him. His coat was smooth. He wiggledand sniffed my hand.

tenderly

scowled

“Get away from that puppy, Rukku. It might bite.”

”

.

You’ll be all right?” Teashop Aunty asked, keeping her voicelow so that the teashop man wouldn’t hear.

Homesicknesspinched my heart for a moment. I thought of the rare weekendswhen Appa was away and Amma had enough energy to join us so wecould cook a meal together.

.

Our story was clearlywritten on my swollen face and your cut lip