MILOYou woke me up pulling away.
无意识地嘟囔
MILOYou woke me up pulling away.
无意识地嘟囔
SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)That's the back he gave me. Ten years from now, at my window. 他就是这样背对着我的。十年后,在我窗前。SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)One tug. Me, naked in his bed. And he picks the younger me. 轻轻一拉。我赤身裸体地躺在他的床上。而他选中的,却是我年轻时的样子
Inner monologue
MILO (V.O.) 《米洛》(原声版)He's still dreaming my name. 他仍在梦中呼唤我的名字。MILO (V.O.) 《米洛》(原声版)One tug, and he sees who's in my bed. Tonight ends there.
我是在做梦吗?我的男朋友躺在这里,他只要一醒过来就能看到十年后的自己,我居然还......
SEBASTIAN 塞巴斯蒂安I came back so you'd look at me like that. One more time.
深情地乞求
SEBASTIAN 塞巴斯蒂安We got married. You stopped looking at me. 我们结婚了。你不再看我了。
可怜兮兮的语气
You stopped looking at me.
但是十年后我们并不幸福,你已经很久没有这样对我了。
The Bed creaks faster.
视野转移,但是可以听见床板吱呀作响的声音
still inside him.
删掉
MILO, eyes closed, braces both hands on SEBASTIAN's chest and sinks deeper with every stroke. His sweat-slick thighs clamp SEBASTIAN's waist. He's shaking at the edge.
改成两个激烈的缠吻,摩擦吧,然后颤抖
MILO sinks down onto him, slow, until there's nothing left between them. Then he rocks his hips, faster and faster. The Bed creaks with every roll.
在被子下,并且动作幅度不要那么大,唯美一点
SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)Forty hours awake. Nothing wakes him. 已经连续醒着四十小时了。无论什么都叫不醒他。SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)Except one tug on that sleeve.
inner monologue,并且改成:除非有人把他推醒
SEBASTIAN doesn't move. His thumb brushes the freckles on MILO's nose.
深情地做着这一切
SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)You should go. Now. 你应该走了。现在就走。SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)He hasn't slept facing me in years.
inner monologue
MILOI've never... Not like that. Not ever.
很爽的语气
Come home tonight. Before I fall asleep.
可怜兮兮地撒娇
MILO rests his forehead against YOUNG SEBASTIAN's. 米洛将额头抵在年轻的塞巴斯蒂安的额头上。MILOThe ceiling light at home's been dead for months. 家里的吸顶灯已经坏了好几个月了。
亲昵地依偎着
Beyond the Garage Window, SEBASTIAN's right hand clenches inside his hoodie pocket. The teeth of the Old Brass Key bite into his palm.
眼眶落泪
The Razor glides down over YOUNG SEBASTIAN's throat. He doesn't breathe.
剃须刀顺着S的下巴一直挂下去,直到刮完了所有胡子
MILOEyes on me. Swallow, and you bleed.
看着我,不要讲话,小心流血
YOUNG SEBASTIANOne more line of code.
应该是百忙之中抽空回复了他
MILOHold still. You scratched me all night. 别动。你整晚都在抓我。
认真亲昵地说
SEBASTIAN pulls open the Bottom Drawer. He lifts out a Faded Hoodie, washed almost white, and a Prototype Wristband stamped CRANE LABS. He shrugs off his suit jacket and pulls the Faded Hoodie over his head. 塞巴斯蒂安拉开最底层的抽屉。他取出一件褪色的连帽衫——洗得几乎发白了——以及一条印有“CRANE LABS”字样的原型腕带。他褪下西装外套,将那件褪色的连帽衫套在头上。He snaps the Prototype Wristband onto his left wrist. 他将原型腕带“咔嗒”一声扣在左腕上。SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)One day. Ten years back. That exact day. 某一天。十年前。就是那天。SEBASTIAN (V.O.) 塞巴斯蒂安(原声)Six a.m. sharp, it drags me home. 早上六点整,它把我拖回了家。His thumb presses down on the Prototype Wristband.
改成,S叹了口气,没看那份文件,拉开抽屉,取出连帽衫,穿上,将VO改成直接说出来的形式:回到十年前的那一天吧;回到我们最相爱的时候,我才能知道这些年我做错了什么
LDER MILO 年长的米洛Separation papers. I already signed. 离婚协议书。我已经签了。SEBASTIAN doesn't touch them. 塞巴斯蒂安不碰它们。OLDER MILO twists the wedding ring off and presses it down onto his own signature.
冷漠、无情的态度
burning in the Floor-to-Ceiling Window at his back.
应该是背后是整个城市的夜景
MILOBossy tonight. 今晚有点爱发号施令。SEBASTIAN sinks his hips lower. MILO arches off the Bed to meet him.
这时候milo可以光着膀子,穿着裤子,并且借位描述,不要描述成直接性行为。
In the pitch-dark Studio, a man's weight pins MILO to the Bed. One Strip of Light from the Window crosses the floor and stops at the edge of the mattress.
也不能完全漆黑,属于光线昏暗,只有窗外射进去的月光
LUCIAN (V.O.) 卢西恩(画外音)More than one man fishes in the dark. More than one man has a scarred wrist. 不止一个男人在黑暗中钓鱼。不止一个男人手腕上有疤痕。LUCIAN (V.O.) 卢西恩(画外音)
inner monologue
LUCIAN (V.O.) 卢西恩(画外音)The widower. His cuffs are always buttoned.
inner monologue,我上次好像也在那个鳏夫上看到了一道疤
LUCIAN reaches over the Fish Basket and clamps a hand around NOAH's left wrist.
改成,看到一道疤痕的影子一闪而过,仿佛发现了什么新大陆似的,抓住诺亚的左腕
LUCIAN does not let go. He stares at the black cuff, buttoned tight over the wrist. 卢西恩没有松手。他盯着那只紧扣在手腕上的黑色袖口。A servant passes the Kitchen Door. NOAH holds still. LUCIAN's eyes stay on the cuff.
他满怀兴趣地盯着,刚想抬手将袖口撩上去看看有什么,一名仆人此时却进来,Lucian才放下手
He lifts NOAH's left wrist off the burlap and presses his mouth to the scar. 他将 NOAH 的左腕从麻布上抬起来,将嘴唇贴在那道疤痕上。
很怀疑的神态
NOAH (V.O.) 《诺亚》(原声版)He hates the widower. He hates me.
inner monologue:不可能,你在想什么,他明明讨厌我!
Their thrusts turn faster, rougher, out of control. With each one, flour lifts off the sacks and drifts down over two sweat-slick backs.
不要直接描述成抽插,描述成接吻,亲脖子、喉结等亲密动作
stripped bare.
不要赤身裸体,改成衣衫不整,眼眸含春
NOAH (V.O.) 《诺亚》(原声版)He's talking about me. 他在说我。
他在说谎!
LUCIAN 卢西恩Last night I had a man in my mill. In the pitch dark. 昨晚,我磨坊里来了一个男人。当时漆黑一片。NOAH stares at the fish. 诺亚盯着那条鱼。LUCIAN 卢西恩He bit his lip rather than make a sound. He shook under me all night long. 他咬住嘴唇,生怕发出声响。整晚,他在我身下瑟瑟发抖。LUCIAN lifts a fish, inspects it, drops it back. 卢西恩捞起一条鱼,仔细端详了一下,又把它放回水里。LUCIAN 卢西恩Best night I've had in Ashcombe. 这是我在阿什科姆度过的最棒的一个夜晚。He finally looks at NOAH, from his buttoned cuffs to his black coat. 他终于打量起诺亚来,从他扣得严严实实的袖口一直看到那件黑色大衣。LUCIAN 卢西恩A poor widower like you, Mr. Fairley? You're not fit to touch him.
对话改成:LUCIAN 卢西恩 I had company last night. 昨晚有人陪我。
NOAH stares at the fish. 诺亚盯着那条鱼。
LUCIAN 卢西恩 A beautiful one. She bit her lip rather than make a sound. 是个美人。她宁可咬着嘴唇,也不肯出一点声音。
LUCIAN lifts a fish, inspects it, drops it back. 卢西恩拎起一条鱼,仔细看了看,又扔了回去。
LUCIAN 卢西恩 Best night I've had since London. 这是我离开伦敦以来最美妙的一夜。
He finally looks at NOAH, from his buttoned cuffs to his black coat. 他终于抬眼看向诺亚,从他扣得严严实实的袖口,一直看到那件黑色外套。
LUCIAN 卢西恩 And you? A year in black, and still sleeping alone. 你呢?穿了一年黑衣,还是一个人睡吧。
LUCIAN 卢西恩 Of course you are. Who would touch a widower like you? Not even in the dark.
NOAH (V.O.) 《诺亚》(原声版)One light, and it ends.
他要做什么?他不会也是......?
Strike a light, and you're gone from my nights.
再给你一次机会,不说话我就当你同意了
In the dark, no man hangs for this.
看来你也很饥渴呢
No names. No lamps. Gone before dawn. 没有名字。没有灯。天亮前就消失了。
不说话,看来是个小哑巴呢
NOAH (V.O.) 《诺亚》(原声版)That voice. Viscount Thorne. 那声音。索恩子爵。NOAH (V.O.) 《诺亚》(原声版)One word, and he knows who steals his eels. 只需一句话,他就知道是谁偷了他的鳗鱼。
改成inner monologue
NOAH slips through the Mill Door in his black coat. He feels his way across the floor toward the Wheel Race, both hands out in the dark.
加上一句inner monologue:都怪可恶的禁渔令,希望这里没人,不然我可糟了!
LUCIAN 卢西恩Every evening at dusk, bring a basket of fish to my back door. Carry it yourself.
施舍而不容置疑的语气
NOAHIt's one trout. 是一条鳟鱼。
眼眶泛红,楚楚可怜
NOAH stares up at him, the trout pressed to his chest.
防备地抬手盯着他
LUCIAN 卢西恩A widower ought to be in black. Not wet linen, showing himself off to any man who rides by.
轻蔑的语气
His gaze travels down NOAH's chest. It stops between his legs, where the wet cloth clings tight. It hides very little, and what it shows is large.
加了一句咽了下口水
A silver signet ring circles his little finger. His eyes are red-rimmed from wine.
不要写饮酒过量
Their thrusts turn faster, rougher, out of control. With each one, flour lifts off the sacks and drifts down over two sweat-slick backs.
改成两个人律动的动作,避开直接的抽插动作
He pushes into him from behind.
有从背后顶进去的动作
LUCIAN 卢西恩There you are. 原来你在这儿。
改成:你怎么才来!
LUCIAN, cravat loose, wine on his breath, hauls him against his chest.
不要写喝醉了
ELIA couple. 一对夫妇
a couple?
ETHAN 伊桑Good. Hold that tension. 很好。保持这个力度。
改成:很好,就是要这么气冲冲地对峙
ELIA mistake. 一个错误。
恼怒地说
ROWAN reaches into the inner pocket of his Suit Jacket. He draws out an Old Keycard printed 1708 and presses it into ELI's palm. 罗万把手伸进西装外套的内口袋,掏出一张印有“1708”字样的旧门禁卡,塞进了伊利的掌心。ELI's eyes never leave ROWAN's face. ELI 的目光始终没有离开 ROWAN 的脸。ROWAN slides the Old Keycard back out of ELI's hand. As it turns, the back shows a stamp: RENEWED JAN 05. He slips it into his inner pocket. 罗万从伊利手中轻轻抽回那张旧门禁卡。卡片翻转时,背面印着一个戳记:2005 年 1 月续期。他将卡片塞进了内口袋。
改成,Rowan想将门禁卡从口袋里掏出来,卡都快掏出一半了,看着Eli的脸犹豫片刻还是塞回去了。
ETHAN 伊桑Nobody knows how a jerk thinks better than him.
开玩笑的语气
ETHAN 伊桑To win back the guy who slept with you and ran by morning. 如何赢回那个和你上过床,却在天亮前就跑了的男人。
Ethan 戏谑地对Eli说:别以为我看不出来你想赢回那个睡完你就一声不吭地跑了的人!
ELIExcuse me? 什么?
改成Eli和Rowan异口同声地说
ETHAN 伊桑New plan. Before winter break ends, Dad gives you dating lessons. 新计划。在寒假结束之前,爸爸会教你约会技巧。
这里改成对他俩说,寒假结束前,爸,你必须得教会Eli约会技巧!
ELI (V.O.) ELI(原声版)
eli的inner monologue
Coffee sloshes over the rim and splatters across the Counter.
不要这么夸张,咖啡液轻微从杯沿洒出,洒得柜台到处都是
Earth to Eli. I said this is my dad. Just call him Rowan.
加上:刚刚说到哪里来着?对了,这是我爸
He snaps his right fingers in front of ELI's face.
这里删掉
ELI stands just inside the Kitchen Doorway, staring past the Kitchen Island. His right hand is jammed in his jeans pocket, fist tight around the Silver Cufflink.
前面加上画面引退,Ethan打了个响指,唤醒刚刚走神的Eli
ELI closes his fist around the Silver Cufflink. He doesn't move.
神情落寞而悲伤
ELI (V.O.) ELI(原声版)R. That's all I get?
自嘲地对自己说
The flame in the kerosene lamp flickers.
煤油灯的火焰映在窗户上闪烁
ETHAN 伊桑You're freezing to death. Stay down.
得意洋洋幸灾乐祸
ETHAN 伊桑Chase. Stay awake. 追啊。别睡着。
惊慌失措地说
He stares at it. 他盯着它看
表情先是迷茫,再是恐惧
No one will ever call you names again.
改成这个世界上再也不会有人骂你了,后面加:chase癫狂的内心独白: No one in the world will ever bully and be obsessed with you anymore
RICHARD 理查德Go outside. Kneel until you come to your senses.
愤怒地斥责
no.glasses.
改成你是 no. glasses?
ETHAN 伊桑I hate you too. 我也讨厌你。
无力地说
Blood from Chase's torn lip glistens millimeters from Ethan's mouth.
不要这么说,说问结束后,两个人的嘴唇中间拉丝
Ethan's hands stay flat against Chase's chest.
无力地贴在chase的胸口上
ETHAN (V.O.) 伊桑(画外音)Push him away. Push him away, you idiot.
伊森的inner monologue
Ethan bares his teeth and bites down hard on Chase's lower lip until the skin splits.
不要这样说,就说伊森紧闭上下唇,但是chase顽固地想要用舌头撬开
ETHAN 伊桑You piece of— 你这混蛋——
愤怒,仿佛被人戏耍了
CHASESay. Please. 说啊。拜托了。
这两个单词只见要有停顿,重音在say上
ETHAN 伊桑What did you just say?
不可置信,绝望地轻呼
Chase stops breathing. 蔡斯停止了呼吸。
chase动作一滞
Ethan raking his soaked bangs back under the desk lamp. The two faces overlap perfectly.
镜头前,伊森在暖黄暧昧的灯光下将刘海往后拨
Your dad hits people exactly the way you do.
还在做最后的抵抗
CHASEWhat did you see, four-eyes? Say it. Out loud.
眼神危险,阴贽,语气冰冷
The rigid metal bars dig hard into Ethan's lower back.
改了,伊森的下背部紧紧抵着身后坚硬的金属拉杆
Chase goes after him,
露出一个恐怖的笑容
I want to sincerely apologize to my classmate. What I did was cruel, and that's not who I want to be. I'm sorry.
装模做样地朝着台下所有人宣布
Richard sits with his legs crossed, hands resting on his knee.
应该是翘着二郎腿,双手交叉放置在腿上
He lowers his hand, pulls out his phone, and opens the burner account. He types: "Tomorrow's gonna be the worst day of my life."
后面加:chase的内心活动:"Tomorrow's gonna be the worst day of my life.
You will apologize. And you'll do it with a smile.
威严地说
I'm not apologizing to some nerd—
倔强地反抗
Press conference. Ten a.m. tomorrow. You'll apologize to that boy in front of the cameras.
不容置疑的威严
It was a little water. He's fine. Honestly, he's probably enjoying the attention—
死不悔改地说
Four point seven million views. My approval rating dropped six points overnight.
语气沉重,仿佛下一秒就要发飙
The message reads: "The chain is nice."
后面加:chase(内心独白):The chain is nice
Ethan stares at the single word. He bursts out laughing and buries his face in the pillow.
画面转到伊森宿舍
Then he types: "please."
chase语气很可怜的内心独白:please
Ethan's face instantly burns. He sits bolt upright, his hand flying to cover the chain at his waist. Gritting his teeth, he types: "Wanna see more? Say please."
画面转到伊森宿舍。后面加:伊森咬牙切齿的内心独白:Wanna see more? Say please
In the high-rise, Chase reads the reply and laughs through his nose, one corner of his mouth curling up. He types: "Shame. It'd look even better with someone pulling on it."
后面加:chase(内心独白):Shame. It'd look even better with someone pulling on it.
Ethan types: "Not for you, anyway."
挑了挑眉,后面加:伊森(内心独白):Not for you, anyway
The phone buzzes again: "Who do you wear it for?"
后面加:chase(内心独白):Who do you wear it for?
CHASEIt's a guy. 是个男生。
说服性地自言自语
He hits pause. His eyes suddenly clear. His brow furrows hard.
先充满情欲似的深吸了几口气
CHASE (V.O.) 《CHASE》(原声版)Who calls himself that? Who the hell is this?
疑问且兴奋
A waist. A thin silver chain swaying across it. A delicate, glasses-free face smiling into the camera, smiling at him.
手机屏幕上:
"Good puppy?
后面加一句:伊森(内心独白):Good Puppy?
No. No way. I actually got off on that?
不,不可能,那个蠢货对我做了这样的事情,我居然还爽了?
Ethan slides down the tiled wall to the floor, his hair still dripping. He stays there. A long beat.
伊森喘着气,仿佛劫后余生般
Good puppy. 好小狗。
调笑和羞辱性的语气
He wipes it dry on Ethan's soaked T-shirt, dragging it slowly from his chest all the way down.
他略带调戏+羞辱地这么做了
Ethan clamps his teeth down hard into Chase's invading thumb.
不要用力咬,咬住就行
Chase lunges, slamming Ethan hard against the cold tiled wall. Pinned against the tile, Ethan's head is wrenched back by a bruising jaw grip. Chase drags his bare thumb across Ethan's wet bottom lip and forces it deep into Ethan's mouth.
这里的动作是,左手拽头,右手拖住伊森的下巴,大拇指摩挲伊森的下唇,然后将拇指探进去,还在里面搅了搅。
Chase pulls it out chest-high.
chase先是很不耐烦地皱眉,停顿,掏手机
ETHAN (V.O.) 伊桑(画外音)Bitch. Idiot. Spoiled piece of trash. One day, I'm going to ruin you.
伊森的inner monologue
he steps directly into Chase's chest instead of dropping.
改成,他用手抹了抹脸上滴落的水珠,另一只手颤抖着指着chase。
raises a hand and pats Ethan's cheek. Pat. Pat. Pat.
这三个拍打要有停顿
Look at you. Pathetic dog. Get on your knees and bark.
美式校园霸凌般地嘲弄,之后语气渐渐转为冰冷刺骨
He grabs a bucket of water from the corner, lifts it, and dumps the whole thing over Ethan's head.
前面加一句,但那笑容转瞬即逝,他转身从身旁的角落抓起一桶水
ETHAN 伊桑I'm sorry. Sorry you're a dumbass.
故意地用很奇怪的语气说对不起对不起
CHASEWanna try that again? Apologize to the young master.
挑衅地说,并且要直接说,向我这个少爷道个歉
Ethan glares straight into his face.
眼神略带恐惧地,但是同时又很生气
Chase smiles
皮笑肉不笑
ETHAN (V.O.) 伊桑(画外音)Here it comes. The idiot's back to settle the score.
伊森的inner monologue
If you feel humiliated, that's your problem. All I did was correct your stupid mistake.
不甘示弱地回击
Ethan's hands find the edge of the sink behind him and grip it hard.
这里,伊森虽然面容很镇定,但他还是悄悄用手抵着身后水池边缘
CHASEYou humiliated me today, four-eyes.
怒气冲冲地说
Sadly, tonight you don't get a choice.
有种幸灾乐祸的语气,但是神态是讽刺的
CHASEGet off me, you freak. Since when do you get to climb on top of me?
不断挣扎
You're freezing to death. Stay down.
语气略带心疼
thrashes against the wool
在羊毛毯下拼命挣扎
his lips purple
嘴唇不要发紫,就是苍白一点,不红润
Tyler pulls out his phone. The glowing screen fills the dark.
泰勒皱了皱眉头
BARTENDER 调酒师"Just go with it," huh? “顺其自然吧”,是吗?(beat) (停顿)Very convincing. 非常有说服力。
嘲弄地说
Mason sinks onto Tyler's empty stool and picks up Tyler's half-finished beer.
梅森仿佛失去了所有力气
Tyler pulls the varsity jacket tightly around his chest, pulls his hat low, and flees out the door.
泰勒低头绕过了梅森
MASON 梅森Since you went viral. 自从你走红以来。
戏谑地说
Mason waves his phone. 梅森挥了挥手机。
笑着
TYLER 泰勒Since when do you even come to places like this?
泰勒步步紧逼
Don't make it weird. You looked like you were about to get eaten alive. What else was I supposed to do?
故作轻松的语气
TYLER 泰勒W-why did you... why'd you do that?
疑问且不敢面对地问
(beat) (停顿)It was nothing. Forget it.
随即绽放了一个灿烂的笑容
TYLER 泰勒A what? 什么?
心虚地说
Back there, you had a... a...
犹豫怎么组织语言
His eyes drop straight to the small of Tyler's back. He lifts a corner of the jacket and the coat hem beneath it.
他的动作是试探且疑惑地
TANK-TOP MAN 无袖衫男...Why am I holding a rose?
疑惑地自言自语
Mason is the first to let go. Tyler doesn't move. He stays exactly where Mason left him, lips parted, eyes still half-closed.
泰勒仿佛被亲懵了
One second passes. Then another. Mason doesn't let go.
反而伸出舌头加深了这个吻
MASON (V.O.) 梅森(原声)It's an act. One second. Then I let go.
梅森的inner monologue
TANK-TOP MAN 无袖衫男Then prove he's with you.
挑衅地说:你说是就是?证明给我们看啊!
MASON 梅森He's with me. 他跟我在一起。
宣示主权地说
MASON 梅森(low) (低)I've got you. 我来帮你。
将头靠近泰勒,抚慰地说
MASON 梅森What the hell is th—
震惊地说
Mason's breath catches in his throat as his gaze locks onto the demonic tail.
瞪大双眼
Tyler's hitched hoodie slips, exposing the glossy black heart-tipped tail flicking against his bare hip.
换一个场景:泰勒的风衣被翅膀撑开,尾巴趁此机会调皮地从风衣下钻了出来,露出了一小截
MASON 梅森Move! 快走!
不耐烦地说
His jaw locks hard.
眉头紧皱
Only the bartender stays clear-eyed. He leans against the counter, wiping a glass, enjoying the show.
改成女调酒师,好笑地欣赏这一幕
Tyler backs straight into the dead-end wooden corner of the bar. The more he panics, the more the tail wriggles. Its heart-shaped tip pokes out from under his hoodie hem, below the coat, flailing in the open air. Tyler stuffs it back down as surrounding men hoist glowing smartphones.
泰勒手忙脚乱地将尾巴的爱心尖塞了回去
PATRONS 赞助人To the guy in the hat!
掷地有声:致那位戴帽子的帅哥!
PATRON 3To the handsome guy in the hat!
欢呼!
PATRON 1 顾客 1Five-five-five, zero-one-four-two. 555,0142。PATRON 2Five-five-five, eight-eight-three-one. 555,8831。
太奇怪了,换成:帅哥,看我!我喜欢你!
TYLER 泰勒Get back! 退后!
改成:你不要这样!
TANK-TOP MAN 无袖衫男Forget kissing. I'd marry you.
激动且爱慕地说
the writhing tail through the coat and down into his waistband.
改成塞进了裤子里吧
Tyler perches stiffly on a bar stool, hat pulled low, wildly out of place among the laughing, dancing crowd.
这里要全是男人
The pink countdown hits 00:00:00.
嘀的一声
The tank-top man looks him up and down, amused.
转过头朝向泰勒,眼神向下扫了泰勒
Tyler stares into the beer, swallows hard, and turns.
转向第三视角,泰勒犹犹豫豫、鼓起勇气朝他转过身
On the next stool, a man in a tank top sips his drink.
泰勒视角
TYLER 泰勒Something... straight. 某种……直的东西。
脱口而出
BARTENDER 调酒师What can I get you?
女调酒师,随意地问泰勒
Hat low, trench coat closed, Tyler stops before the door. Pink and blue neon washes across his face. He takes a deep breath and pushes the door open.
字幕:一家gay吧
TYLER (V.O.) 泰勒(原声)One kiss. Some stranger. Mason never has to know.
振振有词的语气
Mason never has to know.
删掉这句,改成,不要想在亲男人,想象自己正在亲一块肉
He twists, scratches beneath his shirt, then recoils. His fingers find one raised bump, then a second.
衬衫突起一两个小凸块的轮廓
Tyler turns the phone face-down beside his knee.
发出烦躁的声音
Tyler sits on the floor beside his bed, scrolling his phone.
头顶上要有粉色发光的时间倒计时,最好是一小时左右
time: Day 3 evening 时间:第 3 天晚上
傍晚
Mason's shadow cuts across the plaza stones as he steps up behind Tyler, hands shoved in his pockets.
梅森略带疑惑的目光看着正在自言自语的泰勒
Nobody. Just... running lines. For a thing. I gotta go.
慌乱、紧张、却又欲盖弥彰地说
Tyler kicks the base, paces, and jabs a finger at the statue.
焦躁不安地
TYLER 泰勒Hey! Come out right now! Explain what the hell is going on!
恶狠狠地说
Tyler stands directly before the stone Cupid statue under the bright sun, glaring furiously at its carved face.
他头上随便设置一个正在倒计时的时间字幕
He thunks his forehead against the wall.
轻轻地撞了一下墙
TYLER (V.O.) 泰勒(原声)Every twenty-four hours...
迷茫且不确定地说
and reset.
重置到24:00:00
Y-yeah. Late. S-super late. Totally.
磕磕绊绊地说
It's, uh... it's getting late. I should... I'm gonna head back.
脸色泛粉,语气结巴地说
Tyler looks at the wall. Mason looks at the floor. Tyler looks at the lamp.
这几个动作要发生在几秒之内,体现出这两人的慌张无措
He looks at the ceiling.
欲盖弥彰似的咳嗽,脸颊泛粉
Mason jerks upright.
猛地直起身子
TYLER (V.O.) 泰勒(原声)My first kiss. Ever. And I just gave it to my best friend.
泰勒的inner monologue
A crack of thunder on the soundtrack.
不要惊雷,要是那种宣告爱情来了的配乐
MASON 梅森Hold still. I'm checking if you have a fever.
温柔,眉头轻皱
TYLER 泰勒D-don't stand so close. 别……别站得那么近。
结巴又心虚地说,眼神飘忽
GAY GOD (V.O.) “同志之神”(画外音)Kiss a man every twenty-four hours.
gay神没出现在画面,但响起了他的话
(softening) (软化)Whoa. You catch a cold or something?
温柔关切地朝着泰勒说
and shoves the heavy dorm door firmly shut behind him. T
去掉用力和沉重这些形容词