1,337 Matching Annotations
  1. Mar 2018
    1. Visual aspect will also change the text when putting it onto vinyl.

      What do you mean?

    2. rearrangment of this work from audio to vinyl

      what do you mean?

    3. The vinyl will contain no visual aspects like the original because it is a record and typically don’t have many images on them

      But... color? shape? Of course it does have a visual dimension! right? why does your mind discount this?

    4. Gestural and linguistics is what has mainly helped the reformatting of this audio become vinyl and available to many more people in a different way than originally produced.

      What does this mean?

    5. f this story

      What story? How might someone make sense of this post if they haven't been in our class?

    6. I learned that literally everything is multimodal and can be perceived as a text.

      So you are a text?

    7. this vinyl is a text

      Good. Is it possible to take the analogy too far? Are YOU a 'text'? Why or why not?

    8. he primary text was helpful to read first obviously because it will help you interpret and understand better what the message of the supplemental text is trying to say.

      This implies that the supplemental text takes "multimodality" into account. Does it? Or is this something you are doing?

    1. “How I could start to incorporate these different modes in order to reach different interests, but still getting that one message acro

      Good! examples?

    2. In relevance to the Golden Record article, we see many different ways that one message can continue to change throughout time

      This really just compares the texts.

    1. Markel, Howard. 

      These citations need to go above the evaluations.

    2. believe he wants people to get finished reading this and not judge those who are infected b

      Good. And it is fine to use "I"... but be consistent with it

    3. minority,and that may have been the very reason he passe

      Interesting subculture to identify and research

    4. ese

      what kind of researchers?

    5. no quantit


    6. asserts

      "assert".... you have 2 authors so no "s"

    7. teenagers. She uses Magic Johnson, which relates to G

      Okay... finding "relationships" is good. Now begin to think about how these sources affect the way you think about your subject...

    8. ndolyn Barnhart, a doctoral student claims that, “HIV/AIDS-related stigma exerts a direct

      Really nice incorporation of quotation

    9. e fact that John was from Chicago  gives light to

      What might understanding the numbers do for your understanding of the culture embodied in the quilt?

    10. this


    1. 1980

      great. why these tags?

    2. you

      This "you" seems a little odd. WHat happens if you take it out?

    3. This quilt is made up of several colors, prominently navy blue, red, yellow and white. I will give more details as far as where exactly you see these colors on this quilt. I will start off by giving a complete overview of what this panel looks like, then I will give details surrounding the picture in the middle of the quilt. Following that I will describe the borders of this quilt.

      This kind of signposting works, though you might give reasons why you're doing it in this order, if the reason/order is important.

    4. t corne

      Of what? Seems some info is missing...

    5. This panel is 3 feet by 6 feet, which is the average size for each panel on these quilts. This quilt is composed of 8 panels which are all 3 x 6 feet.

      Do both of these need to be said?

    1. he Guardian, meaning that the intended audience for the piece is those who are intere


    2. d researchers or music artists may find this piece interesting because it is a look at the result of drug abuse and fame abu

      Researchers of what? Why use "People" magazine? Legitimate source?

    3. ts to use ethos to get her points across regarding the significance of AIDS in today’s society, as well as to raise awareness of a

      Interesting. Why such a focus on ethos, do you think?

    4. nger, Dies at 62.” 29 May 2011.

      Is this from a newspaper?

    5. esearcher who wants to fin


    6. dence using quotes from those who looked up to Sco

      Perhaps include one or two here? which ones might be useful to you?

    7. tended audience for this piece is the people interested in how violence and rap music correlate

      who reads this journal? what for?

    8. Jeanita W. Richardson and Kim A.


    1. The center image is of Gil Scott-Heron’s debut studio album “Pieces of a Man” released in 1971

      Is this naming or describing? What is left unsaid if you name something?

    2. His influence is reflected in this very quilt piece.

      objective description?

    1. Since each quilt is a primary source riddled with metadata, we are supposed to be able to piece together research as those in the archives do.

      WOW! I never thought of it this way. Can we think of the information within the quilt "data"? What happens when we add "meta"?

    2. , I truly understand what part meta data plays in research. It is the bridge to connecting sources.

      YES! How does one choose when one creates metadata? What does a creator have to consider?

    3. have been improved if my questions were able to branch out and create further ones

      YES! Open to other possibilities. Scope becomes an issue, usually. How to choose which line to pursue?

    4. The thing I found most interesting was the fact that this flow of information stemmed from one question which led to another, and started a chain of research.

      YES! I love it when research feels like this. We become detectives, yes?

    1. king a certain amount of depth found in my first reading response, although I tried to dig as deep as I could.

      Do you automatically believe the texts you're reading? I was at the DC Women's March and I wore the hat. I still wear it. When I do, I get a certain kind of attention. I have strong feelings about what is said in this article, and strong ideas inspired by it. Do you? Why or why not? What advantage or disadvantage might those feelings and thoughts bring to the task of understanding these works?

    2. The Haltman text had more depth to it, so annotating from it was a bit easier.

      Awesome insight.

    3. diametrically opposed

      So "academic" and "news" are "diametrically opposed"? What do you mean by this?

    4. The two texts are polar opposites

      Your annotations don't suggest this. 'Opposite' seems to compare the articles, too, which your notes don't really do...

    1. yrics hold true throughout the whole world and can help bring people together with their love for the music he wrote.

      interesting.. but i wonder about the assumption made here... might the music impose culture as opposed to merely reflecting it?

    2. rs that might find this source useful are nonprofits who want to get more donations or volunteers with the help of those in fandoms.

      why do you say so?

    3. hology at Texas

      Do we need to know specifically where they work?

    4. here are many fan fictions that retell the stories of the movies and often use the songs that Howard Ashman wrote even when using a different version of the fairytale.

      What might this be evidence of exactly?

    5. ports teams.  Many people have a few teams that they pay attention to j

      nice connections made here.. how are film fans and sports fans similar? different?

    6. This information would be useful to someone who wanted to create a new social media platform and make it very popular quickly.

      who reads this source? why?

    7. k, Michael Mill


    8. ne of the events described in the book is San Diego Comic Con which is a

      Okay, but more useful, I think, would be specific discussion of fandoms more generally...

    9. This book was edited by Jonathon Gray a professor of Media and Cultural Studies at the University of Wisconsin-

      What part of this book is useful to you? The intro? The essay re: Bush? Getting specific will help.

    1. Disney’s version of the story of the Little Mermaid.  Ariel has a purple flower in her hair.  Ariel seems to be in mermaid form as she is still wearing seashell

      How might you arrange this text so that it more clearly "goes with" the image of Ariel and not the image below?

    2. were my focus for the visit.

      what visit? Keep in present tense will force you to focus on this page instead of your visit.

    3. As of June 2016, there are more than 49,000 panels in 5,956 blocks.

      "According to...." **Name your source within your text.

    1. Summary

      What do you think about your own thinking about these texts?

    2. found it hard not to be redundant, as many of the points can be used in multiple areas and are mostly tied together

      Yes... What about getting more specific? Or reiterating the question or concept using different words... Remember we did this at the beginning of the semester with our research question?

    3. the article is

      which one?

    4. As an engineering student, I would rather see how to improve technology based on how people interacted with it than try to find how they imparted culture onto the technology.
    1. The toy piano is fast becoming a concert instrument in its own right, with its own (growing) body of repertoire that has moved well beyond John Cage’s 1948 classic Suite for Toy Piano. There are dedicated musicians specialising in toy piano performance all over the world, and numerous composers producing new works written specifically for the toy piano. This unusual miniature instrument provides a respite from the traditional implications of the grand piano, breaks the ice with audiences and allows pianists to perform in locations that would otherwise be inaccessible. In this article the author introduces the history and mechanism of the instrument, performance considerations, extended techniques and approaches to working with electronics, recent repertoire and suggestions for performers and composers. Discussion is supplemented with musical examples.

      This is plagiarism. Please address.

    1. This made me that of ways I can promote or advocate something on social media.

      Develop this idea: what do you mean?

    2. vinyl is a text,


    3. he primary text

      THe next step is to start thinking rhetorically; who is your audience? (not me, not your classmates) What info do they need to have to make sense of this post?

    1. Combing Haltman’s idea of Material culture and 3-d printing we can employ many ways to incorporate touch and serval other senses to our culture sense

      What does this mean?

    2. The authors of the Haltman’s text taught me how to experience an object as space, right then and there. Not only how I would experience but how other people would experience the space of that object.

      THIS IS IT! I think... What would Haltman say about 3D printing (as represented in the 3D article?)

    1. The vibrant colors can show very significant and important messages for political messages and religion. Red represents death, green represents fertility, white represents purity, blue represents love, gold represents wealth and white represents purity. These colors are not seen “connected as one” on other parts of the quilt only exclusively the musical notes and hearts located under his name. I feel t

      This work is not "objective description" right?

    1. Index

      Do you mean this word? What is "index" usually?

    2. refrigerator

      Yep... my favorite part...

    3. oss of neural matter or cringe-induced

      I appreciate your humor, Patrick!

    1. draw attention

      What might Ball et al say about how the multimodality of this article works? Just to "draw attention"? Can you comment on the specific arrangement (etc.) of the modes as they work in the article?

    2. gestural communication

      Yes... I talked in class about one of my philosophical differences with Ball/Arola/Shephard in that they focus on multimodality as it pertains to "communication"... I focus on it as it pertains to "meaning making"... What do you think the difference is and how does this difference affect your thinking about this incident?

    3. a failure in communication

      What do you mean by this? And what are the implications of the incident being labeled "a failure in communication"?

    1. ooking at the AIDS quilt at first glance, I could tell its very centered around Homosexuality and LGBTQ community.

      Tim, this tells me that you don't know much about the quilt yet. You should already know about it at this point and be able to articulate what it is and where it comes from.

    2. it

      "It"? What does this word refer to in the question? It's a good question!

    1. It is statistically proven that gay and bisexual males are most affected by this disease.

      No way this is true. Without supporting evidence you'll end up offending people instead of inviting them into your description.

    2. this quilt

      Which? An introduction here will orient your reader. What does this page do?

    1. help me get better insight when viewing the AIDS quilt.

      I'm not sure what these insights are... yet..

    2. The gun impact shows a great polarity between security/ danger because it can be used so easily for either with a very thin line.

      I'm not sure what you mean by this, but I think seeking issues of "security" in the debate shaped by and within the article "about" violence is an interesting way of using Prownian analysis.

    3. My personal life with racism, social class, and stereotypes can be used to implement a more personal example.

      Okay... now I think I am beginning to understand the connections you're making here. The "Guns" article evokes emotion. Your quilt evokes emotion. Your personal experience evokes emotion. How does emotion aid analysis?

    4. emotional content


    5. These impaction guns

      What does this mean?

    6. forth

      Do you need this word?

    7. view

      Who views?

    1. I sanguinely wish that by applying the teachings of these separate articles, I will be capable of transfiguring my blog into a more welcoming site that is effortlessly coherent.

      Wow there is a lot going on in these final clauses. It seems like you're still working out in your mind what "multimodality" is? You figure it's present in both articles, in content and in action? But you're not sure how? The authors of the Ball text also distinguish between media and mode. What do you think about this distinction?

    2. Through the manipulation of the audio embedded in the vinyl, this content employs aural modes and thus a connection is initiated

      What do you mean by this? What kind of connection?

    3. re-establish the existence

      Did they disappear at some point? What do you mean by this?

    1. ng, ‘The revolution will not make you look five pounds thinner’? My songs were always about the tone of voice rather than

      It's really useful to have quotations in here! Great

    2. Andy Greene is a writer for Rollingstone who has written around 10 well documented articles for the  company. This article detailed a history of Scott-Heron’s music history and who he performed with and when. Even mentioning tat he had written a book when he was was 20.

      one sentence

    3. Dead at

      Interesting you have more than one obit here...

    4. as useful to my research

      What counts as "useful"?

    5. Greg Morrison has experience as a executive producer, editor, reporter and producer. Some companies include CNN, WXIA, BET, and NBC. Denise Quan has been a entertainment journalist and producer, with over 18 years of experience at CNN. This article details and informs readers of the death of Gil Scott-Heron and a brief overview of his life


    6. this source is great for broad information and links my artifact to my topic of study extremely w


    7. , and others who are interested in or involved in the attainment in knowledge regarding African American politic

      This seems a little vague... What does McClure what to have happen in the world because of this volume of work?

    8. The author provides over two pages of evidence including books, magazines, newspaper articles, and websites. This evidence comes from primary sources such as Gil Scott-Heron’s work and secondary sources such as Business Week. McClure’s purpose in writing this article is to provide information and inspire thought on the lives of African American Politics, in this case Gil Scott-Heron.

      combine into one sentence... what happens when you do this?

    9. era.”

      page number?

    1. To conclude

      What does this phrase communicate? What does it mean? Why here? What does it do?

    2. Appropriately named storm music it features some of his more thunderous and fiery works including “The Revolution Will Not Be Televised”, “Pieces of a Man”, “Free Will”, “Is That Jazz” and more.

      None of the highlighted material in this paragraph "describes" the image...

    3. This photo is perhaps my favorite in the panel

      Just description?

    4. This picture is located in the bottom left of panel and features the cover photo of Gil Scott-Heron’s album titled “Reflections”

      Are you just describing the panel here?

    5. This flag is known as the Pan-African flag and shows how deeply embedded Scott-Heron is with his roots

      Are you only describing here?

    6. in which he walked the earth

      Is this objective? or colorful language?

    7. dark and mysterious

      Objective or subjective language here?

    1. Also the important effects that organization of my post and images and color schemes I put on the page can change what my audience might think of my post.


    2. Then trying to comprehend those messages in a way that can relate to and concur with the Arola Sheppard Ball reading was a difficult task

      Because you're "comparing" not "thinking with"...

    3. interactive with readers.

      Is there something about "gestural" mode in this imagining of what Conca could do? Why value the interactive?

    4. message that everything that we know today, language, pictures, or even colors won’t mean the same as they will in the future.

      Why not? What changes?

    5. He suggest that we use a universal form a communication combining all visual, linguistic, gestural, and spatial modes of communication to ensure the messages of danger are understood and believed throughout the generation

      Does Conca use the term "multimodal"?

    6. that he doesn’t go with masses talks about better ways of preventing it

      What does this mean?

    1. Benard is from a French heritage a

      Is this important to him? Why do you think so?

    2. Even though he was a U.S boy scout the concept of what a scout is and what they do are not all that different universally.

      Seems a bit far-fetched... can we find convo re: US scouts?

    3. Kwesiga is trying

      who is this?

    4. see it,

      What is 'it'?

    5. uld be interested in this topic coul

      Focus on the article, not the 'topic'...

    6. Annotated Bibliographies This post is regarding the AIDS quilts found at the NAMES project. The questions are marked by bullet points. These questions are the basis of my research, and the thought process that went into why I made this entry. The inverted pink triangle for many years has been a simple to the LGBT and the struggle they have been through. Originally just a pink triangle, the symbol was used to identify homosexuals in Nazi controlled prison camps. Later that same simple (just inverted) would be a hope and beacon to the anyone who has been affected with HIV/AIDS. The movement would be to send a message of “Silence=Death”, that if nothing is done then people will surely continue to suffer and die. How did the inverted pink triangle push the LGBT community forward and improve awareness for HIV/AIDs from its dawn to the present? Morris, Charles E. “ACT up 25: HIV/AIDS, Archival Queers, and Mnemonic World Making.” Quarterly Journal of Speech, vol. 98, no. 1, Feb. 2012, pp. 49-53. EBSCOhost The author Charles E. Morris lll, takes the remembering history as a great importance to society and see it as path way to a better future; stating that AIDs “significance and transformation” show the “welter” of “futurity” (Morris 1). Morris then goes on to present that the government did nothing  as the Reagan administration passed no new orders or bills to help the infected and the supreme court case Bowers v. Hardwick’s, which didn’t allow lawful protection of homosexual sodomy,  and so the people had to take matters into their own hands starting the ACT UP movement in San Fransisco, Atlanta, Philadelphia, and several other cities. The evidence provided is documented historical content of the events that happened during the inception of the ACT UP movement.  All throughout the essay Morris has a certain tone about him, the same way a proud American might talk about the Revolutionary war, his purpose is to reembody the history the the LGBT and AIDs awareness on to the present generation so they won’t forget and continue to the fight the good fight. The intended audience would be the younger demographic of the U.S today, as the younger generation of millennials continue to progress, Morris wants them to remember the history of that progressive era that led to them.   The article can be specifically tailored to those who fear the concept of them being homosexual. If someone was “still in the closest” this article is show that they are not alone and never will be, and for them to embody the ideals and passion that these innovators envisioned for America. The source connects with my personal quilt by showing the passion that the inverted pink triangle represent. In a way it honors those who came before and those who have struggled but in more deeper sense it imagines a world that could have been or has still yet to come. A world that Renard did not live long enough to see it become a reality. The Valkyrie helmet is iconic symbol of the opera, often the tradition go to outfit for opera performances. The norse viking helmet is often associated with the opera through it many appearance on stage all throughout Europe and popular opera theaters in America like the New York opera. How has the HIV/AIDs virus affected the opera and its fan base? Brass, P (2016, February). Did AIDs kill New York City opera?. Huffingtonpost. Perry Brass is 19 times published author and have won several literary awards: IPPY awards, Lambda Literary Awards, and Ferro-Grumley Fiction Award from New York’s Ferro-Grumley Foundation just to name a few

      All these needed? First sentence needs all three info points

    7. The Valkyrie helmet is ic

      Hard to tell if the image goes with the info above or below it until AFTER I read... transitions...

    8. , as the younger generation of millennials continue to progress

      Who reads this journal? for what reason?

    9. All throughout the essay Morris has a certain tone about him, the same way a proud American might talk about the Revolutionary war, his purpose is to reembody the history the the LGBT and AIDs awareness on to the present generation so they won’t forget and continue to the fight the good fight.

      goes in second paragraph

    10. f “futurity” (Morris 1)

      Nice to include citation here, but can you simplify/clarify by including a complete, direct phrase or sentence?

    11. les E. Morris


    12. This post is regarding the AIDS quilts found at the NAMES project.

      Isn't it about your research project? That's more specific, I think.

    1. he quilt is more than just a stylish fabric, but it is meant to represent Renard.

      Okay, this is where the writing dives into analysis. Keep this kind of writing for a different post...

    2. The lower left hand co

      What is the above video?

    1. correctly analyze the tex

      Are we "analyzing" here? Or are we trying to do something else? If the latter, what are our possibilities?

    2. properly connect

      What makes for a 'proper' connection?

    3. Then using a more personalized emotional connection to allow the reader to better comprehend the ideas I had in mind. 

      Whose emotions? How does that work?

    4. Through this it will make me write a more representative piece instead of just having such a provincial view on my topics and writing

      Do you mean... complex? Nuanced? Not sure what you mean by 'provincial'...

    5. As for my writing is concerned this analysis of the machete effect will give me proper insight to my quilt analysis and essay.  For one polarities are extremely important when it come to any analysis of an object.

      So you are viewing the "tool"/"weapon" as a kind of polarity? Interesting!

    6. Historically it was shaped into the weapon as revolts and revolution from pheasants and slaves.

      What does this mean?

    7. This is the main reason why main media television broadcast typically like to report more sad or horrific new because it would bring in higher ratings

      Have you ever watched news from another country? Most allow a kind of gore we won't report in this country. What do you make of that?

    8. By seeing objects in a practical view takes away the interesting aspect of it in turn making it dul

      What do you mean?

    1. the golden record

      What is this? (Perhaps describe what you're reflecting on here; imagine an audience that is unfamiliar with the course or your readings.)

    2. schematics of the material t

      What does this mean?

    3. a new form of appreciation towards the process behind the creation of the golden record.

      Explain this "new form" of appreciation?

    4. a different way

      Different from what?

    1. This source does not connect with my panel, I initially thought that when I first came across this site gave an “over-time” interactive map that will show areas where HIV/AIDS were heavily concentrated throughout Los Angeles, but it only shows an interactive map of where it is heavily concentrated today.

      Interesting. Good. But remember, whatever cultural group you end up studying, it's likely that group exists today with a relationship to HIV/AIDS>

    2. Founded September 4, 1781, Los Angeles is a city

      The source you're evaluating is the website for the city of LA? Okay. But this seems far from useful for research centering on 1980s. What do you think?

    3. the masses

      "the masses"? Who specifically is likely to find the facts housed on this site useful? For what purposes?

    4. ia font is a font created by Russell Bean, who did a various amount of designing from graphic design to typography to lettering design. He moved out to Los Angeles and worked for various studios by cre

      Again... this is a primary source. Instead, research the effect of fonts...?

    5. A Chorus Line, a Broadway musical based off the book by James K

      This is being used as a primary source. That's why it doesn't really make sense to follow the format I'm requiring for the AB. Replace this with a secondary source about the musical.

    1. I learned that when it comes to describing an image is not just listing the physical objects in the image, but rather describing the context of physical objects in the image.

      Great. Does Haltman help you consider this? If so, how exactly? Or perhaps it was the machete article?

    2. originates

      What do you mean by "originates"? "makes"?

    3. tends to

      What do you mean by "tends to"?

    1. These aspects tend to embody a “language” that words cannot express. It allows us as one to use our senses and become focus on a common belief/interpretation of how we envision ourselves in others that aren’t within the same culture.

      Interesting. What does this have to do with your reading of Haltman and Barras? What I'd like to see is more of an answer to this question.

      What was the experience of completing this project like for you? What was challenging or appealing about it? WHy do you think so?

      I'm really looking for your self-perceptions. Your insight into your own experiences.

    2. In conclusion

      What does this phrase do for you here? Do you need it? Why or why not?

    3. Animals play a big role in the creation of music because it help close a bridge between cultures that were established centuries ago.

      Interesting idea. Is this yours?

    4. portrays

      What does this word mean in this context?

    5. I feel this can be connected to the Hartman text because it states that material culture may have a physical form but there are also parts of a culture that are abstract.

      Actually, this isn't what Haltman means. He means that even abstract elements of a culture can take "object" form in the details of the objects the culture it creates. How does this change your ideas?

    1. ou want your analysis of things to be very descriptive; so readers can enjoy what there reading and

      I notice a lot of "you"s here. Try rewriting this, or your next reflection, with "I" instead. I want to know not what you think "should" be, but what you think about what you're reading. And how you're reading it...

    2. is where you create that image in your readers’ mind to create that real life connecti

      I don't think so. Doesn't Haltman/Prown text emphasize the reason why to generate details? When to do so? To generate material you could work with later... before you have an idea... is different from curating material you want to communicate to someone else... right?

    3. When giving the opportunity to describe something, regardless of what it is, it is vital to give every detail.

      It depends on why you're describing someting, right? At some point too much detail distracts...

  2. Feb 2018
    1. tachment to Jamaica was what diverted my attention to Jamaica and the tremendous levels of homophobia that transpires there

      Interesting! This would be an interesting cultural group to focus on.

    2.    Ruth C White, the lead researcher in this study, has received her Ph.D., MSW, and MPH, is proactive in the mental health community and is a Clinical Associate Professor. Dr. White and her colleague Robert Carr declare that homophobia is a vital catalyst for the preju

      one sentence pls

    3. urce coincides with the other Mardi Gras related article I discovered and

      how? how do you envision these statistics helping inform your idea about the culture embodied in the quilt panel?

    4. at this might not be a source that could be employed for practical uses.

      Is this more like a primary source?? If it is, choose to replace it

    5. s website would be of great help for those LGBTQ youth needing aid or health services and others who wish to learn about First City Network.

      yes but how might researchers use it?

    6. First City Network

      what is this group? https://firstcitynetwork.org/

    7. most momentous steps in gat

      SWEET ! Nice connections! Is the sports community what you're researching?

    8. Bull provides various interviews from former athletes, for instance, Olympic gold medalist Greg Louganis who recounts his experiences dealing with the stigma associated with HIV and homosexuality. Steve Mathis, former pitcher for the Macon Braves, a minor team associated with the Atlanta Braves, also shares the adversities he faced while being playing for the Braves.

      can you make this one sentence?

    9. LGBTQ website “Q-Digital”, in this article he iterates the differing mentality that athletes in the LGBTQ community and who are afflicted with AIDS hold.

      can you take words out to make this not a run-on sentence?

    10. scholars, researchers, and scientists

      what kind?

    1. oting specifi

      This is interesting information, but ti doesn't belong on this page. This page needs to be dedicated to JUST a "thick description" of the panel. What will you do with the resT?

    2. Dedicated

      Why include this information down here? It's not describing the panel. What is it doing and where might it be more useful? To whom and why?

    3. Mr. Fulkerson manages to have himself omitted from a significant amount of internet content.

      What does this mean? There was very little internet use in the 1980s. Remember, you are not here to research Tony Fulkerson and create a biography for him.

    4. The significance that all these various symbols and meanings when placed together on the same palette can all be left as conjecture for the time being.

      Do you need this here? Might it be more effective somewhere else?

    5. would

      why 'would'?

    6. Whoever weaved this quilt was able to have all the t-shirts fused to the quilt while also allowing them to be level in appearance, coinciding with one another.

      Is this pure objective description or something else?

    7. creator makes sure to keep the t-shirt and imagery intact


    8. plethora

      Is this objective description?

    9. nd Mr. Roddy

      Who is this? Remember your reader doesn't know this information.

    10. average dimensions which one would expect from a quilt of this nature

      Aren't all panels the same dimensions? And are those symbolic?

    11. vary in appeal as well as content

      Is this necessary? What purpose does it serve?

    12. presented is one

      which panel? presented where? A full intro needed.

    1. What does one do when they are not sure whether they have received the right connotations from that artifact? If artifacts bear specific aspects that have a meaningful story, how would one account for different perspectives?

      Great questions!

    2. I hope in the near future that I will able to prove my understanding of this idea by being able to simply hold an item or examine an area and deduce its significance

      How does Woodman's text affect how you think about this?

    3. effect they may have on a culture and individual

      Interesting... So objects don't only reflect culture they simultaneously affect it? This might be itneresting to write about for your analysis.

    1. Originality

      Is this a subtitle? hard to tell..

    2. These frames are meant to help Michael Harmon’s thoughts stick out.

      what does this mean?

    3. These features were thought by the panel’s creator to emphasize the messages stitched inside of the border of the vinyl.

      just describing here?

    4. quieter matte black


    5. e compar

      this paragraph is solid, detailed observation. great.

    6. Then i will describe how the positions of the objects placed on this panel contribute to the meaning of this panel.

      This is analysis? Be sure to take out anything that isn't pure description...

    7. e to extraneously take out the message presented in this quilt,

      What does this mean?

    8. suggesting they could be Michael Harmon’s favorite colors because they are so specific

      Is this objective description?

    9. Of the 5956 blocks making up a 54 ton that memorializes over 94,000 individuals, according to the name project site; the number present on the back of the block described in this piece is 1867. From this you can tell that the block was a early contributor to the names project, but also the person memorialized lived in a different time. The main panel i chose in this quilt is dedicated to Michael Harmon.

      introduction material

    10. This panel is featured on on a standard eight panel block as a block that was present on the wall of the quilt home when you first walk in.

      An example of sentence-level confusion. Can you clear this up? What do you mean?

    1. elp me to figure out if Michael

      "to figure out"? or "to think about"?

    2. believe this source has the perfect connection to my article. I feel like if Michael himself

      Is he Indian? WHat's the connection? explain

    3. Nita Mawar is a member of th

      This notation is incomplete. thesis? types of evidence? Not all "teachers, students, researchers" would read this particular journal...

    4. My artifact connects

      Good. Find connections. BUT THEN EXPLAIN the relationships you're making/finding...

    5. working at the forefront of HIV education for the past 30

      Plagiarism! Careful!!

    6. social issues,

      What does this mean? Don't we all have "social issues"?

    7. The NIH(National Institute Of Health) is one of the world’s foremost medical research centers. An agency of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, the NIH is the Federal focal point for health and medical research. I assume the NIH used gathered economic data to gather information because a sample of the general population was used.

      all of this belongs in sentence 1... as does the following sentence that quotes the 'thesis'...

    8. This source provides correlation to my panel, but it lacks the correlation to mental health in the united states.

      Doesn't "how people feel" have to do with mental health?

    9. I think the author’s purpose in this article is to spread awareness so that maybe people’s views toward HIV positive people will change, and so people can really understand some of the struggles these people deal with

      what makes you think this?

    1. In summary

      What are you summarizing? your own thinking? why summarize it here?

    2. t its no

      What do you mean by 'its' here?