121 Matching Annotations
  1. Mar 2024
    1. for - Elon Musk Don Lemon interview - Elon Musk - cancels Don Lemon - Elon Musk - South Africa, early childhood trauma

      Summary - Lemon points out Musk's consequential role in the world and that people who invest in his various projects have a right to know about the wellbeing of the leader of the company they are investing in. - Actions speak louder than words and his cancelation of Lemon's show demonstrates he was very uncomfortable with Lemon's questions. It was obvious from Musk's defensive body language.

      Reference - https://fortune.com/well/2023/09/17/does-elon-musk-have-ptsd-walter-isaacson-biography/ - https://www.nytimes.com/2022/05/05/world/africa/elon-musk-south-africa.html

  2. Oct 2023
    1. ``` Trauma Releasing Exercises are a form of Cult Deprogramming

      [[Trauma Releasing Exercises]] (TRE) by [[David Berceli]]

      related articles: [[Tremor]], [[Quakers]] (aka "shakers"), [[Bradford Keeney]] ([[Shaking medicine]]), [[Somatic experiencing]] ([[Peter A. Levine]]), [[Ecstatic dance]], [[Runner's high]], ... (its revealing that wikipedia has no articles on these "alternative medicine" topics... all hail the cult of big pharma!)

      this association assumes that cults use [[Psychological trauma]] to imprison their slaves.

      Psychological trauma is an emotional response caused by severe distressing events such as accidents, violence, sexual assault, terror, or sensory overload.

      in every cult, there are people who want to escape. this "want to escape" starts early in childhood, where it is counteracted by punishment = by creating psychological trauma.

      Sigmund Freud's [[Psychoanalysis]] always blames "some childhood trauma" for "neurotic" behavior in adults, instead of fixing the child education, to prevent the creation of that trauma in the first place = radical solution.

      the cult slaves are expected to use their body only for working, not for sports, not for fighting, not for pleasure. all problems should be solved peacefully and intellectually ("let us talk..."). because the cult leaders know: if the slaves make too much use of their body (shaking medicine), the slaves would escape.

      also related: [[Slave morality]] is another word for [[Cult]], because the [[Public opinion]] of every cult is a form of slave morality (beautiful lies), and hard truths ([[Red pill and blue pill|red pills]]) are hidden as master morality. ```

  3. Aug 2023
      • Wu wei as not forcing
      • Lao Tzu: man who isn’t conscious of his superior virtue, is this virtuous
      • Watts: Wu Wei as not intentional Wu Wei, and is thus Wu Wei
      • Doing opposite of society is not spontaneity (you are trying)
      • go back to your childhood, realise the grandness of the universe
  4. Mar 2023
  5. Dec 2022
  6. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. “She had engaged to go as governess to Mrs. Smallridge’s children—a dear friend of Mrs. Elton’s—a neighbour of Maple Grove; and, by the bye, I wonder how Mrs. Elton bears the disappointment?”

      Mrs. Elton thought she had taken on Jane as a 'pet' and this was helping her, but now Jane has to back out of her promise to teach those children. How precarious educational opportunities were for children, even in the upper classes.

  7. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Half a dozen natural children, perhaps—and poor Frank cut off!—This, though very undesirable, would be no matter of agony to her. It inspired little more than an animating curiosity.

      I read somewhere about how having a lot of children is looked down upon for poor people but merely eccentric for the wealthy. Another instance of the varying expectations of rich and poor. In Regency England, I think children were expected to not get in the way of adult life and not draw attention to themselves. Charles Dickens work expresses more about the burden children in poverty were perceived as during the time.

  8. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Emma, on reaching home, called the housekeeper directly, to an examination of her stores; and some arrowroot of very superior quality was speedily despatched to Miss Bates with a most friendly note. In half an hour the arrowroot was returned, with a thousand thanks from Miss Bates, but “dear Jane would not be satisfied without its being sent back; it was a thing she could not take—and, moreover, she insisted on her saying, that she was not at all in want of any thing.”

      Immaturity on Jane's part, I think. Both for being so picky about eating as to make it the pressing concern of all your relations, to refuse perfectly good arrowroot, and then to scour the meadows for your own.

      Arrowroot is a food of low nutritional value that was sought after by people who had various food intolerances.

      There are connections to racism as it relied on slavery for mass production and exportation and the obsession with 'purity' also has ideological similarities with reference to race.

      http://www.digitalussouth.org/vegetable/vegetable.php?vegName=Arrow%20Root

      https://janeaustensworld.com/tag/historical-food/

  9. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Yes, indeed, there is every thing in the world that can make her happy in it. Except the Sucklings and Bragges, there is not such another nursery establishment, so liberal and elegant, in all Mrs. Elton’s acquaintance. Mrs. Smallridge, a most delightful woman!—A style of living almost equal to Maple Grove—and as to the children, except the little Sucklings and little Bragges, there are not such elegant sweet children anywhere. Jane will be treated with such regard and kindness!—It will be nothing but pleasure, a life of pleasure.—And her salary!—I really cannot venture to name her salary to you, Miss Woodhouse. Even you, used as you are to great sums, would hardly believe that so much could be given to a young person like Jane.” “Ah! madam,” cried Emma, “if other children are at all like what I remember to have been myself, I should think five times the amount of what I have ever yet heard named as a salary on such occasions, dearly earned.”

      Jane will have a good living because there will be lots of children to teach (as she is trained as a governess).

      Emma tries to be self-depricating about her childhood but given her other actions it could also come off as insincere.

  10. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. trusting that you will some time or other do me greater justice than you can do now

      Among other things, this is an admonishment to grow up.

    2. An old married man

      Pushing away from any association with childhood, adolescence, or youth.

    3. Emma, glad to be enlivened, not sorry to be flattered, was gay and easy too, and gave him all the friendly encouragement, the admission to be gallant, which she had ever given in the first and most animating period of their acquaintance; but which now, in her own estimation, meant nothing, though in the judgment of most people looking on it must have had such an appearance as no English word but flirtation could very well describe.

      Adolescent need to be flattered and entertained at every moment. Her immaturity comes to a head later on on the chapter and Mr. Knightley acts as an elder and scolds her. It is unsettling for a number of reasons but one of which it is that it highlights their age difference and then also positions him as superior in terms of emotional maturity as well. Questions are raised as to what the role of a partner should be in such circumstances. On the one hand, it is good be honest with one another about how unkind behavior affects social dynamics, but also one cannot be partners with someone who is always telling you your social failings or someone who needs constant social monitoring.

  11. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Mr. Knightley’s excessive curiosity to know what this word might be, made him seize every possible moment for darting his eye towards it, and it was not long before he saw it to be Dixon. Jane Fairfax’s perception seemed to accompany his; her comprehension was certainly more equal to the covert meaning, the superior intelligence, of those five letters so arranged. She was evidently displeased; looked up, and seeing herself watched, blushed more deeply than he had ever perceived her, and saying only, “I did not know that proper names were allowed,” pushed away the letters with even an angry spirit, and looked resolved to be engaged by no other word that could be offered. Her face was averted from those who had made the attack, and turned towards her aunt.

      Adolescent teasing. Similar to flirting and teasing from earlier.

    2. Emma was pleased with the thought; and producing the box, the table was quickly scattered over with alphabets, which no one seemed so much disposed to employ as their two selves. They were rapidly forming words for each other, or for any body else who would be puzzled. The quietness of the game made it particularly eligible for Mr. Woodhouse, who had often been distressed by the more animated sort, which Mr. Weston had occasionally introduced, and who now sat happily occupied in lamenting, with tender melancholy, over the departure of the “poor little boys,” or in fondly pointing out, as he took up any stray letter near him, how beautifully Emma had written it.

      Playing a children's game. Also, a re-emergence of the word play from the riddles earlier.

      Mr. Woodhouse also conflates childhood with poverty again: "poor little boys."

  12. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. “Here,” resumed Harriet, turning to her box again, “here is something still more valuable, I mean that has been more valuable, because this is what did really once belong to him, which the court-plaister never did.”

      To borrow from an earlier conversation, is the box of treasures, Child-like or Child-ish?

  13. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. gipsies

      Here is a link to a post about the Romany of England during the regency. It says that to even have spoken with these people during the time was a crime and that might account for some of Harriet's fear. It also adds another dimension to the conflation of 'othering' of children, the poor, and racism.

      https://janeaustensworld.com/tag/gypsies-in-regency-england/

    2. She had an unhappy state of health in general for the child of such a man, for she hardly knew what indisposition was; and if he did not invent illnesses for her, she could make no figure in a message.

      Another connection between childhood and ill/wellness

    3. when the other very person was chancing to pass by to rescue her!

      Mr. Churchill was supposed to rescue Harriet from her childhood of poverty (represented by the 'gang' of unruly children), being single, her embarrassment at being rejected by Mr. Elton, and more...

    4. Harriet was soon assailed by half a dozen children, headed by a stout woman and a great boy, all clamorous, and impertinent in look, though not absolutely in word.—More and more frightened, she immediately promised them money, and taking out her purse, gave them a shilling, and begged them not to want more, or to use her ill.—She was then able to walk, though but slowly, and was moving away—but her terror and her purse were too tempting, and she was followed, or rather surrounded, by the whole gang, demanding more.

      This brood of children, called a 'gang' later on in the paragraph is to be feared in the book. The 'stout' woman may be the mother. They are poor people intending to rob Harriet. The scene sets up another instance where the poor are symbolized not just by children, but by them behaving badly.

  14. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Why she did not like Jane Fairfax might be a difficult question to answer

      There are tinges of sibling rivalry here. Mr. Knightley notices and points them out.

    2. By birth she belonged to Highbury: and when at three years old, on losing her mother, she became the property, the charge, the consolation, the foundling of her grandmother and aunt, there had seemed every probability of her being permanently fixed there; of her being taught only what very limited means could command, and growing up with no advantages of connexion or improvement, to be engrafted on what nature had given her in a pleasing person, good understanding, and warm-hearted, well-meaning relations. But the compassionate feelings of a friend of her father gave a change to her destiny. This was Colonel Campbell, who had very highly regarded Fairfax, as an excellent officer and most deserving young man; and farther, had been indebted to him for such attentions, during a severe camp-fever, as he believed had saved his life. These were claims which he did not learn to overlook, though some years passed away from the death of poor Fairfax, before his own return to England put any thing in his power. When he did return, he sought out the child and took notice of her. He was a married man, with only one living child, a girl, about Jane’s age: and Jane became their guest, paying them long visits and growing a favourite with all; and before she was nine years old, his daughter’s great fondness for her, and his own wish of being a real friend, united to produce an offer from Colonel Campbell of undertaking the whole charge of her education. It was accepted; and from that period Jane had belonged to Colonel Campbell’s family, and had lived with them entirely, only visiting her grandmother from time to time. The plan was that she should be brought up for educating others; the very few hundred pounds which she inherited from her father making independence impossible. To provide for her otherwise was out of Colonel Campbell’s power; for though his income, by pay and appointments, was handsome, his fortune was moderate and must be all his daughter’s; but, by giving her an education, he hoped to be supplying the means of respectable subsistence hereafter.

      I read a theory that Jane Fairfax is Jane Bates are mother an daughter. The evidence was Miss Bates affection and their same name, because Georgian women named their daughters after themselves. The paragraph that says decidedly that Jane had a mother that she lost when she was three, so I prefer an interpretation about a trauma bond where a woman who lost her husband takes an interest in a small child without a mother.

      We also see another instance similar to Harriet where people take in an orphaned girl with the intention of making her a toy or doll for themselves or another child and they think they are helping by 'giving' her a destiny--in this case, training to be a governess.

      This is affronting, even through the Campbell's are regarded as good people.

  15. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Upon my word,” exclaimed Emma, “you amuse me! I should like to know how many of all my numerous engagements take place without your being of the party; and why I am to be supposed in danger of wanting leisure to attend to the little boys. These amazing engagements of mine—what have they been? Dining once with the Coles—and having a ball talked of, which never took place. I can understand you—(nodding at Mr. John Knightley)—your good fortune in meeting with so many of your friends at once here, delights you too much to pass unnoticed. But you, (turning to Mr. Knightley,) who know how very, very seldom I am ever two hours from Hartfield, why you should foresee such a series of dissipation for me, I cannot imagine. And as to my dear little boys, I must say, that if Aunt Emma has not time for them, I do not think they would fare much better with Uncle Knightley, who is absent from home about five hours where she is absent one—and who, when he is at home, is either reading to himself or settling his accounts.”

      More perhaps ventriloquization about being an aunt. Maybe an expansion of expectations of motherhood that moves beyond biological childbirth.

  16. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Mrs. Weston, with her baby on her knee, indulging in such reflections as these, was one of the happiest women in the world. If any thing could increase her delight, it was perceiving that the baby would soon have outgrown its first set of caps.

      Will there be opportunities for sibling rivalry with Anna and Emma similar to the rivalry with Jane.

    2. “Do you?—I have no doubt. Nature gave you understanding:—Miss Taylor gave you principles. You must have done well. My interference was quite as likely to do harm as good. It was very natural for you to say, what right has he to lecture me?—and I am afraid very natural for you to feel that it was done in a disagreeable manner. I do not believe I did you any good. The good was all to myself, by making you an object of the tenderest affection to me. I could not think about you so much without doating on you, faults and all; and by dint of fancying so many errors, have been in love with you ever since you were thirteen at least.” “I am sure you were of use to me,” cried Emma. “I was very often influenced rightly by you—oftener than I would own at the time. I am very sure you did me good. And if poor little Anna Weston is to be spoiled, it will be the greatest humanity in you to do as much for her as you have done for me, except falling in love with her when she is thirteen.”

      This is strong example of the undercurrent of nature and nurture with regard to children but also with regard to social class.

    3. “That is,” replied Mr. Knightley, “she will indulge her even more than she did you, and believe that she does not indulge her at all. It will be the only difference.” “Poor child!” cried Emma; “at that rate, what will become of her?” “Nothing very bad.—The fate of thousands. She will be disagreeable in infancy, and correct herself as she grows older. I am losing all my bitterness against spoilt children, my dearest Emma. I, who am owing all my happiness to you, would not it be horrible ingratitude in me to be severe on them?” Emma laughed, and replied: “But I had the assistance of all your endeavours to counteract the indulgence of other people. I doubt whether my own sense would have corrected me without it.”

      Mr. Knightley might be making a commentary about Emma.

    4. Mrs. Weston’s friends were all made happy by her safety; and if the satisfaction of her well-doing could be increased to Emma, it was by knowing her to be the mother of a little girl. She had been decided in wishing for a Miss Weston. She would not acknowledge that it was with any view of making a match for her, hereafter, with either of Isabella’s sons; but she was convinced that a daughter would suit both father and mother best. It would be a great comfort to Mr. Weston, as he grew older—and even Mr. Weston might be growing older ten years hence—to have his fireside enlivened by the sports and the nonsense, the freaks and the fancies of a child never banished from home; and Mrs. Weston—no one could doubt that a daughter would be most to her; and it would be quite a pity that any one who so well knew how to teach, should not have their powers in exercise again. “She has had the advantage, you know, of practising on me,” she continued—“like La Baronne d’Almane on La Comtesse d’Ostalis, in Madame de Genlis’ Adelaide and Theodore, and we shall now see her own little Adelaide educated on a more perfect plan.”

      Mrs Weston (Miss Taylor)'s baby. Emma feels Mrs. Weston was able to 'practice' on her. This baby has a mother in Mrs. Weston and a 'sister' in Emma.

  17. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. languor of ill-health.

      This is interesting. In the previous chapter, there is a nostalgia for overcoming childhood illness, but in this chapter, ill health in ladies is something commmonplace that influences one's schedule and connections.

  18. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Poor little Emma! You were very bad with the measles; that is, you would have been very bad, but for Perry’s great attention. He came four times a day for a week. He said, from the first, it was a very good sort—which was our great comfort; but the measles are a dreadful complaint. I hope whenever poor Isabella’s little ones have the measles, she will send for Perry.”

      Childhood disease and the survival of it as germane to childhood.

    2. rs. Weston, who is carefulness itself. Do not you remember what Mr. Perry said, so many years ago, when I had the measles? ‘If Miss Taylor undertakes to wrap Miss Emma up, you need not have any fears, sir.’ How often have I heard you speak of it as such a compliment to her!”

      In Persuasion, nursing does not belong to a man, it isn't his province, and here in Emma is a description of nursing a child as a compliment to womanhood.

  19. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Now, if your friends have any gratitude, they will say something pretty loud about you and me in return; but I cannot stay to hear it.”

      The dancing and talking and giggling seem to remind of Georgian childhood ideals. Is there a positioning by Austen in here where being rich or part of the leisure class offers some extension of certain childhood pleasures?

  20. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. enry is a fine boy, but John is very like his mama. Henry is the eldest, he was named after me, not after his father. John, the second, is named after his father. Some people are surprized, I believe, that the eldest was not, but Isabella would have him called Henry, which I thought very pretty of her. And he is a very clever boy, indeed. They are all remarkably clever; and they have so many pretty ways. They will come and stand by my chair, and say, ‘Grandpapa, can you give me a bit of string?’ and once Henry asked me for a knife, but I told him knives were only made for grandpapas. I think their father is too rough with them very often.” “He appears rough to you,” said Emma, “because you are so very gentle yourself; but if you could compare him with other papas, you would not think him rough. He wishes his boys to be active and hardy; and if they misbehave, can give them a sharp word now and then; but he is an affectionate father—certainly Mr. John Knightley is an affectionate father. The children are all fond of him.” “And then their uncle comes in, and tosses them up to the ceiling in a very frightful way!” “But they like it, papa; there is nothing they like so much. It is such enjoyment to them, that if their uncle did not lay down the rule of their taking turns, whichever began would never give way to the other.” “Well, I cannot understand it.” “That is the case with us all, papa. One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.”

      Descriptions of the boys. I wondered why the effort to describe them when they are not thought of as primary characters. Is it that they give hints to the personalities of the main characters or are these attempts by Austen to describe people in her life and a little nod to nephews, siblings or other children she knows? From my understanding of her life, she was delighted with and invested in her role as aunt. It is interesting to read her books with this in mind.

    2. “Harriet must give us as much of her company as she can while my brother and sister are here. I am sure she will be pleased with the children. We are very proud of the children, are not we, papa? I wonder which she will think the handsomest, Henry or John?”

      Tandem of brothers to match the two sisters: Emma and Isabella.

    3. “But I do not see why poor Isabella should be obliged to go back so soon, though he does. I think, Emma, I shall try and persuade her to stay longer with us. She and the children might stay very well.”

      Concern for Isabella's health and the children is interesting in light of our understanding that Emma's mother died. Did she die in childbirth? Did Emma also lose a sibling?

    4. CHARADE.

      Is this really a game for adults? Or it is something more common to children and adolescents?

  21. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Emma felt herself so well acquainted with him, that she could hardly believe it to be only their second meeting. He was not exactly what she had expected; less of the man of the world in some of his notions, less of the spoiled child of fortune, therefore better than she had expected.

      Emma is relieved the man is not a 'child of fortune'--which is a disparaging term that she doesn't see in herself.

    2. But you, who have known Miss Fairfax from a child, must be a better judge of her character, and of how she is likely to conduct herself in critical situations, than I can be.” “I have known her from a child, undoubtedly; we have been children and women together; and it is natural to suppose that we should be intimate,—that we should have taken to each other whenever she visited her friends. But we never did. I hardly know how it has happened; a little, perhaps, from that wickedness on my side which was prone to take disgust towards a girl so idolized and so cried up as she always was, by her aunt and grandmother, and all their set. And then, her reserve—I never could attach myself to any one so completely reserved.” “It is a most repulsive quality, indeed,” said he. “Oftentimes very convenient, no doubt, but never pleasing. There is safety in reserve, but no attraction. One cannot love a reserved person.”

      Jane Fairfax as a child being described in ways that provide the opposite of Emma's description earlier.

  22. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. “She always declares she will never marry, which, of course, means just nothing at all. But I have no idea that she has yet ever seen a man she cared for.

      It is a fair argument that in Austen's time, to marry is to finish resigning childhood or maybe formally committing to the attempt at bearing and raising children?

    2. “There is hardly any desiring to refresh such a memory as that,”—said Mr. Knightley, feelingly; and for a moment or two he had done. “But I,” he soon added, “who have had no such charm thrown over my senses, must still see, hear, and remember. Emma is spoiled by being the cleverest of her family. At ten years old, she had the misfortune of being able to answer questions which puzzled her sister at seventeen. She was always quick and assured: Isabella slow and diffident. And ever since she was twelve, Emma has been mistress of the house and of you all. In her mother she lost the only person able to cope with her. She inherits her mother’s talents, and must have been under subjection to her.”

      More insight into Emma's childhood and the development of her personality. Clever, assured, confident, competent. We also learn that Emma is like her mother and therefore, it is reasonable to assume that she does what her mother might do if she were here.

    3. twelve

      Insight into Emma's childhood personality--reading, drawing, and lists.

  23. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Harriet

      Does Emma see Harriet, not so much as a person to find a husband for as a surrogate child to worry about?

  24. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. Goddard

      What happens to children who are not as wealthy but who are orphaned...they go to a school like Mrs. Goddard's. So now the number of people in the book without a mother in childhood is 4 (Emma, Isabella, Frank, and Harriet).

  25. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. father

      Mr. Churchill's mother also died, as did Emma's. His stand in mother was Mr. Weston's sister? From this vantage point, he and Emma seem to have this thing in common that would give rise to a similar personality?

  26. www.janeausten.pludhlab.org www.janeausten.pludhlab.org
    1. remembrance

      Suggestion here that mother's caresses are or can be an integral part of childhood and remembering them is important to adult personality.

    2. two

      There is potential for a bond of sisterhood here like in other novels, but it doesn't materialize. Nonetheless, we have a sense of Emma's childhood with a widower and a governess who took up some of the mothering.

    3. childhood

      In a wealthy family, would your mother have done this, or would a governess or nanny done it?

    1. As has been demonstrated, it is not a question of paying ornot paying. Rather, it is a question of how we want to pay, which then affectsthe amount we end up spending.
    2. By summing together these costs, the overall estimate is that in 2015, child-hood poverty in the United States was costing the nation $1.03 trillion a year.This number represented 5.4 percent of the U.S. annual GDP.The bottom line is that child poverty represents a significant economicburden to the United States.
    3. to lowered economic productivity through reduced earnings. In addition,increased health costs amount to $192 billion, whereas costs associated withincreased crime and incarceration (increased victimization costs of street crime;increased corrections and crime deterrence; increased social costs of incarcer-ation) total $406 billion.

      Childhood poverty results in an annual loss of $294 billion due...

  27. Sep 2022
    1. I took along my son, who had never had any fresh water up his nose and who had seen lily pads only from train windows. On the journey over to the lake I began to wonder what it would be like. I wondered how time would have marred this unique, this holy spot--the coves and streams, the hills that the sun set behind, the camps and the paths behind the camps. I was sure that the tarred road would have found it out and I wondered in what other ways it would be desolated. It is strange how much you can remember about places like that once you allow your mind to return into the grooves which lead back. You remember one thing, and that suddenly reminds you of another thing. I guess I remembered clearest of all the early mornings, when the lake was cool and motionless, remembered how the bedroom smelled of the lumber it was made of and of the wet woods whose scent entered through the screen. The partitions in the camp were thin and did not extend clear to the top of the rooms, and as I was always the first up I would dress softly so as not to wake the others, and sneak out into the sweet outdoors and start out in the canoe, keeping close along the shore in the long shadows of the pines. I remembered being very careful never to rub my paddle against the gunwale for fear of disturbing the stillness of the cathedral.

  28. Aug 2022
  29. May 2022
    1. People with eating disorders are often found to have a history of insecure-ambivalent attachment styles. It is thought that sufferers believe they have earned the closeness of others only when they meet their expectations. They then transfer this to their appearance and thus to their eating behaviour

      ambivalent attachment eating disorder

  30. Mar 2022
    1. China’s Mao Zedong and Romanian dictator Nicolae Ceaucescu also had brutal childhoods, with consequences that, in Mao’s case killed 35 million people, and in Ceaucescu’s case, forced women to have unwanted children, Miller pointed out. We can add others: the members of Myanmar’s junta who have murdered millions, mostly Rohingya as well as other minority groups; the Chinese leadership that is imprisoning hundreds of thousands of Uyghurs in prison camps….the list goes on,  

      Chairman Mao was brutalized and his unhealed trauma caused tens of millions of deaths.

    2. Stalin was also brutalized by his father when he was a child, she pointed out. Stalin was an only child. Like Hitler he was the first child to survive after three siblings who had died in infancy. His irascible father was almost always drunk and laid into his son from an early age. Despite the fame and power he later achieved, Stalin suffered throughout his life from a persecution mania that drove him to order the killing of millions of innocent people. Just as the infant Stalin lived in fear of sudden death at the hands of his unpredictable father, so the adult Stalin lived in fear even of his closest associates. But now he had the power to fend off those fears by humiliating others

      Stalin suffered trauma as a child and later brutalized millions, acting out his unhealed projections of fear and control.

    3. This was Hitler’s OWN PERSONAL BRAND OF MANIA. And it is traceable to the insecurity of his existence in his own family, the insecurity of a child constantly living under the threat of violence and humiliation. Later millions were to forfeit their lives so that this child – now a childless adult – could avenge himself by unconsciously projecting the grim scenario of his childhood onto the political stage.

      Hitler's unhealed trauma induced the death of millions of other lives, continuing a cycle of trauma.

    4. what’s also evident is what he didn’t seem to get: appropriate attachment—the strong and requisite bond between a parent and a child that leads to a healthy life and without which children can die or be damaged.

      We create monsters, large and small through the neglect of the child's needs. We continuously create them and new, large scale events like wars create the next generation.

    5. The reality is that Ukraine didn’t attack Russia, had no plans to attack Russia, and why would it? Russia’s military is 10 times larger AND they have nuclear weapons. It’s clear that Putin has created his own reality about the situation, one that isn’t shared by people who operate in facts. Besides, his actions cannot be justified merely because he believes his reality. He’s a damaged person who needs to stop what he’s doing before he shatters the lives of millions more.

      Historian Yuval Noah Harari makes an astute observation to this same effect, which I comment on in my other Annotation: https://hyp.is/go?url=http%3A%2F%2Fdocdrop.org%2Fvideo%2FyQqthbvYE8M%2F&group=world

      Harari says "these are the seeds of hatred and fear and misery that are being planted right now in the minds and the bodies of tens of millions, hundreds of millions of people, really. 00:26:20 Because it's not just the people in Ukraine, it's also in the countries around, all over the world. And these seeds will give a terrible harvest, terrible fruits in years, in decades to come. This is why it's so crucial to stop the war immediately. Every day this continues, plants more and more of these seeds. 00:26:44 And, you know, like this war now, its seeds were, to a large extent, planted decades and even centuries ago."

      In true abuser/abused cycle, Putin is foisting his unhealed trauma onto the rest of the world, perpetuating another cycle of intergenerational pain.

      We as a species must surface this as the root cause of all the misery that never seems to go away. We need to see this as the systemic root cause of the entire perpetuation of pain that keeps humanity locked in perpetual misery, one generation after another. This is the key cultural change that will boost humanity to the next stage of cultural evolution.

      We are now experiencing the unhealed pain of the previous generations. They are fruit that have ripened. We in THIS generation have to recognize that if we do not identify this at this system level, it will always be this way. We need to make an effort RIGHT NOW, in OUR generation to stop this cycle on a mass scale.

  31. Feb 2022
  32. blogs.baruch.cuny.edu blogs.baruch.cuny.edu
    1. While the world is full of-troubles

      I percieve a vague reference to childhood, innocence and sleeping with these two final lines. Sleeping similar to being a child is often associated with vulnerability. Two words together "stolen" and "child" make it even more sinister. As in the child, is either mentally or physically being stolen away from the world. When they grow up, they are "stolen" by faeries.

  33. Jan 2022
    1. Prof. Gavin Yamey MD MPH. (2022, January 7). Thank you @j_g_allen for continuing to advocate for childhood vaccination & for sharing evidence on masks Yesterday, the U.S. saw a record number of COVID-19 pediatric hospital admissions, almost 1,000 Unvaxxed kids are 10 X more likely to be hospitalized than vaxxed kids 1/2 [Tweet]. @GYamey. https://twitter.com/GYamey/status/1479265484562386944

  34. Nov 2021
    1. ReconfigBehSci. (2021, November 2). interestingly the Singapore Health Minister also mentions “boosting through mild infections”—A concept that is currently generating much furore in the UK in the wake of the release of the JCVI minutes on child vaxx decisions 1/n [Tweet]. @SciBeh. https://twitter.com/SciBeh/status/1455445587910922240

    1. Dr Daya Sharma 😷🥽💨🧼💉💉. (2021, October 30). Some of the UK JCVI deliberations are deeply disturbing, eg arguing against childhood vax so that they can get infected & boost immunity in adults. Also imply that vax doesn’t have an individual benefit! 🤯 How much of this warped thinking is present in Australia? #COVID19Aus https://t.co/o887d2etcW [Tweet]. @DrDayaSharma. https://twitter.com/DrDayaSharma/status/1454418003429183492

    1. Prof. Gavin Yamey MD MPH. (2021, October 30). “Circulation of COVID-19 in childhood could therefore periodically boost immunity in adults through exposure” When I say childhood vax ALSO benefits adults, folx say “you can’t use benefits to adults in your argument!” JCVI uses benefits to adults of letting kids get infected 👀 [Tweet]. @GYamey. https://twitter.com/GYamey/status/1454433823085715461

  35. Oct 2021
  36. Sep 2021
    1. Michael Mina on Twitter: “With all the news of vaccines & immunity, did you know measles infections destroy immunity and cause ‘Immune Amnesia’, increasing risk of all other infections Our research in ‘15 & ‘19 discovered this & the abbreviated story is written up nicely here: 1/ https://t.co/t5DKoQljxM” / Twitter. (n.d.). Retrieved September 7, 2021, from https://twitter.com/michaelmina_lab/status/1435037668027641861

  37. Jun 2021
    1. So sometimes when I do stupid stuff, I still have that mindset of a kid. It's weird. I don't know how to explain it. Just like I did a lot of stuff, because I felt like I got robbed of that time. So it's like, "You know what? If I go to a party and I get drunk and this and that and I get locked up—Oh well, I'm still young."

      Time in US - childhood - memories

    2. Once you realize that it's not really how you were taught to believe, or not for you in that case, I feel like a lot of kids just give up and lose hope, because it's already hard as it is. Not being able to get a job and still trying to do things right without breaking the law. And then when you realize it's never going to change for you, man, you just like, "Whatever. Okay." Or, "If I can't get it like this, I'm going to get it like that."

      Time in US - losing hope loss of dreams

    1. : In Miss S. class, I remember there were two boys who were nice to me, J___ and— what's his name? Sorry. I still know him. He's still a good friend of mine. O___. They both kind of spoke Spanish, so they kind of helped me out as well, but I wasn't allowed to speak to anyone.

      Time in the US, Making Friends

    2. My dad's family is on the wealthier side and a little bit on the powerful side, and my mom has no money nor connections, and she's poor. When they were divorcing, by the end of their marriage—I think it was the most awful marriage that I've seen—he was threatening her with taking us away and completely …

      Mexico/ Before the US, Mexican Childhood, Family; Migration From Mexico, Reasons, Domestic Violence

    3. Yes, my dad hired somebody to find us. My mom really did not leave any trace at all. She just pretty much left like a thief in the night, literally [Chuckles]. They eventually tracked us down and I got a phone call. We got a phone call. I think it was one of my grandparents who answered. Very reluctantly, they handed over the phone and it was my dad and I remember crying. I remember being hysterical. I remember being like, "Oh, my God. This is my dad. He's here. This is my dad. He's not gone.” It's weird, but I thought it was two different worlds and, in this world, I no longer can have my dad. That was the way I started to cope with it. The States were not my dad and this is where my dad was, so we were on different planets now. It was not something that was possible.

      Time in the US - family - father returns for children

    4. Of course. I grew up fairly wealthy in Mexico. I had a big, big house. I had two German Shepherds that ran around everywhere. I had a playroom, my own room. I had a great childhood. I went to private school. It was amazing, so to go from that ... My dad and I were inseparable. I have extremely fond memories as a child, and I remember I didn't want to go to my own room. I would sleep on top of my father. That was my place. They had to buy a king-sized bed because I would not leave my father's side.

      Life in Mexico - childhood - memories

    5. My dad's family is on the wealthier side and a little bit on the powerful side, and my mom has no money nor connections, and she's poor. When they were divorcing, by the end of their marriage—I think it was the most awful marriage that I've seen—he was threatening her with taking us away and completely … you know she would never see us ever, so like a thief in the night, she grabbed my two sisters and I and she moved us to the States.

      Before the US, in Mexico - Childhood, memories - migration to the US - Domestic violence

  38. May 2021
  39. Apr 2021
  40. Mar 2021
    1. Deepti Gurdasani. (2021, February 27). The campaign against @DrZoeHyde that has involved several scientists targeting her with personal attacks, and trying to misrepresent her is deeply disappointing. She has been referred to as ‘evil’, ‘idiotic’, ‘sadistic’, and a’sociopath’. A few thoughts on these attacks. [Tweet]. @dgurdasani1. https://twitter.com/dgurdasani1/status/1365641557404229638

  41. Feb 2021
  42. Nov 2020
    1. Anaphylaxis is a life-threatening reaction that results in difficulty breathing, swelling in the mouth and throat, decreased blood pressure, shock, or even death. Milk, eggs, wheat, soy, fish, shellfish, peanuts, and tree nuts are the most likely to trigger this type of response.

      Symptoms of allergic reactions

    2. Possible symptoms include itchy skin, hives, abdominal pain, vomiting, diarrhea, and nausea.

      Symptoms of an allergic reaction

  43. icla2020b.jonreeve.com icla2020b.jonreeve.com
    1. garrulous

      It is very interesting that a small boy's vocabulary include words such as garrulous and other relatively unusual words/phases throughout the article. I feel like most of the adults wouldn't have that kind of vocabulary. It would be interesting to see what the TTR is for this story in particular compared to the other ones in the book.

  44. Oct 2020
    1. ‪if you’re ever feeling down, just remember that the greatest talents of our time were all once consistently fooled by peek-a-boo ‬
  45. Sep 2020
    1. the caregiver and the quality of the relationship (33), functioning as a mediator of attachment experiences (34). These representations tend to be extended into adulthood (17). In certain cases, parents are not able to provide a safe haven for their children, offering them frightening or unpredictable caregiving (27). As a consequence, experiences of interpersonal trauma can be detrimental to the core conceptual system (35) and can become permanently imprinted in an individual’s internal working model (31), including ensuing long-lasting effects on attachment and interpersonal relationships in later life

      Abuse can start as early as infancy and continue to affect the child into adulthood.

      I was correct when I said that I think the lack of nurture as a child and the lack of parents affect my confidence and the way that I view relationships.

      Childhood is where you begin to develop confidence... think self soothing. When they don't fear things continuously they feel same and they feel secure.

  46. Aug 2020
  47. Jun 2020
  48. May 2020
  49. Apr 2020
  50. Feb 2020
    1. This ‘evolutionary theory of socialisation’ proposes that children who experience family stresses, including father absence,should experience early puberty, ‘precocious’sexuality and anxiety (in women) or aggression (men),as such a strategy resultsin higher reproductive success in a stressful adult environment where paternal investment was likely to be low, and interpersonal relationships unreliable.

      So would it be reasonable to say that the apparent "dysfunction" is really a mismatch between their childhood environment and adult environment?

  51. Dec 2019
    1. pursued its noisy way beneath. The same lulling sounds acted as a lullaby to my too keen sensations: when I placed my head upon my pillow, sleep crept over me; I felt it as it came, and blest the giver of oblivion.

      The 1831 edition adds this passage to emphasize, with the word "lullaby," the childlike fears Victor is now constantly trying to calm.

  52. Oct 2019
  53. s3.us-west-2.amazonaws.com s3.us-west-2.amazonaws.com
    1. ouwillbealittlesurpriedwhenItellyouMrElyslittlegirlafewdaysagowastakenoutofthecreekfrdead.Theyworkedseveralhoursbeforeshediscoveredanywarmthinhrbody&hardlyanysymptomsofanimation.ImentionthisthatyoumaydoubleyourwatchfulnessoverlittleJulia

      Boutwell tell Aitkin that Ely's daughter nearly drowned

    2. herselfwithherchildrenamongthosewhowereseekingafterGod".Shedesiredthepardonofhersine,andtheoins¢ofherchildrenmorethananythingelse.Inaccordancewithouradviceonherreturnhomesherearedthefamilyaltar,andeversincemorning&eveninghasbeenheardthevoiceofprayer&praiseinherdwelling.SheappearsverydesirousthatherPaganrelativesshouldcomeandlistentothewordofGo

      one Native mother wants to convert herself and her children

    3. enttovisitasickchild.FounditinsasufferingconditionaNoclothessaveamiserableblanketthrownoveritsshoulders;itsbreastandlimbsexposed.Itappearedtobeverymuchafflictedinitslimbs,itshandsandfeetbeingpartiallywithere

      Sproat visits a sick child

    4. WilliamTBoutwellPapers,MNHS.1Box.P2528M

      Boutwell departs for Sandy Lake with his whole family and a 2 week old baby

    1. nOctoberlast,oneofournumber,aninfantoftenmonnhsold;ardtheonlychildofMr.andMrsSproat,wasremoved_framthisrorldafterashortilln

      Mrs. Sproat's child died after sickness

    2. Ybu,§reprobablyawarethat‘odhastakentwoofournhreechildrent

      two of Ely's children died

    Tags

    Annotators

  54. Sep 2019
    1. WehavenofourChildren,betweenthebirthfnotwoofwhomwasthereabove18months.TheycannotlearntodosuchbusiesswithoutgoingtoCollege,Perhapshecan.B[u]tareallbabiesandrequiiscqnstantattention.Besideswhattheysufferfromneglectintheireducation,theysufferfromneglectinotherrespects.Thecareofsuchafamilyisenoughtophoweverstrongherconstienfeebledbydisease.Durimyself,exceptthekindassispartof[the]dayatatimeatassociateinthemission,dreofherownfamilydidnotpethanatherconnnementwitquitefeeble,shehasbeencagratitude.Thepromiseofstostratethehealth&stren[g]thofanyMother,ionmaybe;muchmoreonewhoseconstitutionismyWife'slastconnnement,sheha[d]nonursebuttancerenderedbyMrsNewtonwhoassistedusathreeorfourdifferenttimes.MrsTownourssedthechildafewtimes,butthenumerousdutiesrmithertodomore.Mywifehoweverwasbetterhanyofherotherchildren.Tho'herhealthisnowrriedthroughsofarinamannerthatcallsforspecialrengthequaltoourday,hasbeenverined.Mywifeoftenfeelsasifshecouldnotsustaintheconstantlabourswhichdevolvedup

      there are four children at La Pointe in 1836, all of whom are considered babies that need constant care

      Hall thinks that they are being neglected both in terms of education and actual care

      the women are sick a lot and cannot care for the babies as well as mr. Hall thinks they should be

    Tags

    Annotators

  55. Aug 2019
    1. MrElytcLJmenottosayanythingtoherbutwhipherdirectly,&thenadded,"sheneverdoessotome.Itisbecauseyouareslackinyourgovernment.Alas,Ifearitistootrue.Ifrequentlyspeaktoheroftenbeforesheminds.Imustbegin,adifferantcourse.Iwillspeaktoheronce,&ifshedoesnothear,speaktoheragain,&thencorrectherifshedisobeys.Some-timeswhentoldtodoathing,sheisheedlessaboutit&goesratherwnndslowlyIdonotknowwhattodointhatcase,ifsheunderstoodmoreitNbeverydiffere

      Parenting styles

    2. hebabewasinthecradlelyingveryquietlywhenallatonceshescreamedout.Miss0tookherup&examinedher,shesawmarksoffingersonherfacethelittlegirlhadevidentlybeenscratchingher.Thegirldeniedthatshehaddoneanythingtoher.Itookherout&whippedherarms&sentherhometoldhernevertocomeinthehouse

      A little girl comes into the Ely home and scratches the baby

    Tags

    Annotators

    1. fyouwilllearnhimtoreaddoasthewhitesdo,Ishouldbesoglad,Idontknow,whatIcondoforyou

      families want their children to fit into white society

    2. ychildrenarepoor&ignorant

      how mothers feel about their children not knowing how to read, write, or sing in English

    3. “isfiedwith.fewmonthsinthefamily.Lastspring,inordertomakeexperi-mentoftheconfidenceoftheIndiansinus,andtoexhibitmorefullybeforethem,theadvantagesofcivilizedoversavagelife,wetookintoourfamilytwochildr

      the Mission Family took two Native children into their care to show the Natives how civilized life is better than their savagery

    4. eetingthechild-renandotherswhoweredisposedtoco

      on Sabbaths when there was no interpreter, the children and anyone else free was collected to read scripture to

    5. mall,seldomexceedingtwentyscholars,andalargepartofthetimenotabovetwelveorfifteen.Onthereturnofthetraders,shouttheletofAug.itnumberedsomewhatmore.Severalchildrenwereleftbyclerksinthefam—iliesatthisplacetoattendschool.AfterthereturnoftheIndiansfromtheirgardens,aboutthefirstofSept.itnumberedthirtyormore,endaveraged25.FromthefirstofNov.whentheIndiansleft.fortheirfishinggrounds,mostoftheIndianboysleftalso,andhaveattendedbutlittlesince.Atthepres-enttimeitnumbers23,andaverages30."ithoneexceptiontheconductofthescholarshasbeenasgoodascouldbeexpected.

      at the school in La Pointe, the numbers of students varied depending on the time of year and whether or not the children were needed to work at the gardens, or fish (the boys left and most didn't return to school)

  56. Jun 2019
    1. Internalization of anger can cause heart problems. As the Levenson study above shows, holding in your anger takes a toll on your heart. If you grow up in a household that is intolerant of your anger, ignores your anger, or fails to name, discuss or validate the reasons for your anger, you learn only one way to deal with it: wall it off. This may allow you to cope as a child, but it can harm your heart. Sensitivity to stress can cause back problems or headaches. What makes you sensitive to stress? Not dealing with your feelings. When you wall off your fear, your insecurity, your uncertainty, your anger, sadness, or hurt, those feelings do not go away. They simply pool together on the other side of the wall, waiting for something to touch them off. Then, when it happens, they all surge at you, making you feel overwhelmed and stressed. So going through your life with your feelings blocked makes you more sensitive to stress. Lack of self-awareness makes you vulnerable to poor habits. Families who don’t notice what their child is feeling miss getting to know their child on a deeply personal level. So they sadly remain unaware of who their child really is. I have seen, over decades of treating Childhood Emotional Neglect, that if your parents don’t see you, you do not learn that you are worth looking at. You grow up to be unaware of your own needs, and deep down you don’t realize that your needs even matter. You then are vulnerable to eating or sleeping too much or too little, drinking too much, or engaging in other behaviors that can harm your health. 3 Steps to Stop Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) From Harming Your Health Start paying attention to your feelings as you go through your day. Learn more emotion words and make an effort to use them, including naming your own feelings see the book Running On Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect for an exhaustive list of feeling words). As you do steps 1 and 2 you will start to feel more. Now it is time to begin to actively take charge of your feelings. Work on learning the emotion s

      IT should also be stressed that family dysfunction is highly variable and study correlations should never be construed as simple cause and effect. None of it is that simple--especially when it comes to dysfunctional family dynamics.Serious abusers for instance are expert liars (lest outsiders shine light on their true nature), and many come to clinic with stress related complaints about their own childhood experiences. Therapists and other healers must keep that in mind, and not fall to the flattery of 'so-and-so' is so good and helped me so much," while concealing and denying ongoing abuse they may be passing on--some in frank denial--on to their own families and to their own children.

  57. May 2019
    1. “I disappeared into books when I was very young, disappeared into them like someone running into the woods.”

      Sometimes I literally ran into the woods

  58. Jan 2019
    1. childhood whose playfulness can in turn be a blessing to society

      This reminds me of C. S. Lewis' appreciation of the child. Lewis believed children should be taken seriously and there is much to learn from a child's perspective. These beliefs were reflected in his works.

    1. These tenets are fulfilled when students set up individual learning goals and customize their learning environments to achieve those goals.

      In my opinion this is what education is all about child centered learning

  59. Feb 2017
    1. The course of nature will be the same tomorrow that it is today; or, the future will resemble the past"

      Apparently, this is a surprisingly successful rationale for meteorology. If you just assume "tomorrow's weather will resemble today's," you'll end up more right than not, and can actually beat some meteorologists. Then again, Jim Flowers and the KMTV Accu-Weather Forecast might have just been terrible.

  60. Oct 2016
    1. female scientists’ capabilities get downplayed while their ineptitude gets played up in professional settings, sometimes highlighting their lack of skills

      What does this teach young children? How does this affect younger generations?